Category: BOOK

In my 10th year of recovery, I am still reminded of other’s lingering trauma from when I was in active disease. And they have the right to feel what they feel. Let’s face it…
Although addiction/substance use disorder is a brain disease, it caused me to behave in unhealthy ways that deeply affected my own life, and that of my family and friends.
I will say that I still feel hurt and somewhat isolated from some of my family and friends. It is a “different” relationship. It is always respectful, and fun, and loving, yet, with a defiinite sense of an implied “keep your distance.”

At the same time, I have worked so hard and succeeded to reinvent myself, and to lead by example, and to love unconditionally.
I cannot force anyone to feel something that may be gone due to whatever they have experienced, and/or perhaps their unwillingness to truly forgive. And perhaps they are fearful of a deeper connection because they fear I will go back to unhealthy choices/behaviors.

If we are unwilling to have an honest dialogue, nothing ever gets resolved.
Certainly, when one says, “I’m fine. I’m not angry anymore,” with their arms folded across their chest with deep sadness in their eyes, I recognize the underlying sadness and pain.
And, “although the reality is deeply painful, I take comfort in knowing that I am never alone.”

I focus on the relationships that have healed, and the ones that I am engaged in where we are still working together to get to a more connected place.

It stings.
It sucks.
Both the disease and the destruction of the lives in its path, including my own.
But…I know that I have done, and continue to do my best…as a mother, a grandmother, a friend, a teacher/coach.

As painful as this is and heartbreaking for me, and for so many others who have survived this disease, all we can do is accept what is happening in the moment, and continue to pray.
We have no control over how someone else feels, or responds to us, or if that will ever change.

I continue to search for a deeper meaning. I believe I understand what that is… that we have no control…over anything…

I continue to practice my S.P.E.A.R. and S.W.I.M. into Wellness program to guide me, daily, through this process.

You can read about my program in my book Write Pray Recover:A Journey To Wellness Through Spiritual Solutions and Self Care is available on Amazon, and other stores online worldwide.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

P.S. LIVE YOUR LIFE…FOR YOU. WHOEVER IS MEANT TO BE ON YOUR JOURNEY WITH YOU, WILL BE.

Being “titanium “ is nothing to brag about. If you are impenetrable you are therefore devoid of feelings, and do not possess a spiritual compass. Here is where one lives through ego which is completely transparent.

However, when the heat is turned up, even titanium begins to lose its strength…and, it doesn’t stand a chance against “bullets” fired from high-powered “truth” where Spirit steps in with a light that illuminates and melts the life of lies. Lies become the magnet to an eventual bending of the metal and where “truth” finally bursts out for all to see. One is left naked and vulnerable. Their greatest fear becomes their reality. And they have a choice to ask for spiritual support with a humble heart, or not.

As I always say, “Truth is where your freedom begins, and where restored peace becomes our daily experience.”

One way or another, the “truth” IS ALWAYS revealed.

Love,

Wendy

Hold the space for one to go within, to be courageous, to find humility, to speak their truth, to experience peace and freedom, to seek forgiveness, and to be open to a dialogue that will be the catalyst for healing.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

Serendipity story…

I have not thought about The Wizard of Oz since my kids were little other than maybe now and again through the years.

My dear friend, Steve, who I had not seen in a year and a half visited me and used this movie title in an analogy for something that he was explaining to me.

Then my friend Tara, who I gifted this beautiful piece of artwork to about 4 years ago, made by my late stepfather, Harold, of The Wizard of Oz, returned this to me today as she said she was downsizing and thought to herself that this piece of my stepfather‘s legacy should stay in my family. It was my late mom, Judy’s favorite piece that he made. He was so talented and made dozens of beautiful pieces.

And today, watching “Serendipity,” there is a specific reference to The Wizard of Oz that jumped out at me as another “sign.”

I believe these signs reveal to me what I have been shown is about to show up “behind the curtain…”

Spirit communicates in the most curious ways, and this is a “normal” part of my every day life. “Our” communication is constant and clear, and I always understand the guidance I am being given, and shown the specific answers to my questions and prayers.

When we are open to Divine communication, we see, hear and feel beyond our physical limitations.

To be continued!…

Love,

Wendy

When we engage with a trauma survivor, we want to use trauma informed words and behaviors steering clear of phrases like, “Put on your big girl/boy pants,” or “You’re all grown up now, and that was a lifetime ago,” or “Get over it.”

Trauma, when left untreated and unprocessed becomes embedded on a cellular level. We must be empathetic and realize that insensitive phrases and words such as these, and the like, are unkind, and one cannot just “skip over” details of the experienced trauma to “get over it.” This is how it remains stuck, and one remains unwell on a cellular level. Body, mind and spirit.

We must encourage one to slowly unpack, at their own pace, their own experiences, and provide a safe, non-judgemental space for one to do so.

My objective is always to nourish ones soul.

A trauma informed approach uses empathy, patience and compassion, and holds the space for one who has experienced trauma to heal in their own time, and in their own way. We ask them what they need to unpack the details of the trauma.

And, we meet them there.

Love,

Wendy

When we ask for the truth to be revealed in order to experience closure, we must prepare ourselves to receive it. And, sometimes it will not deliver closure at all. Only more epiphanies.

Wow.

Yet, it may cause us to reach higher, and deeper in our next relationship. And, we may learn more about our own resilience, and more about the inner work we still need to do, including following God’s initial guidance.

Rebuilding is a process that creates an even stronger foundation of self, with God, and with another.

Love,

Wendy

Connect to the Universe and be certain that the signs that you believe you see, hear and feel are no “coincidence.”

Love,

Wendy

When we speak our truth, it releases what we have suppressed, thus offering us a release of stale feelings, emotions and unhealthy thoughts that may manifest physically in our bodies as “dis-order.” Truth offers us freedom.

And, although another person may be too selfish and self absorbed in order to hear us in our truth, and in fact, makes our truth about them without ever acknowledging our truth, the purpose of our own release is always about keeping ourselves authentic, at peace, and in good health.

I am reminded, once again, that decades of insensitive, narcissistic behavior, does not change in one who is unenlightened.

“I just can’t see past myself…
A little more like mercy, a little more like grace
A little more like kindness, goodness, love, and faith
A little more like patience, a little more like peace.” – Zach Williams

I pause, and always end the conversation with, “I wish you well.” I am certain that my devoted spiritual practice and connection guides me in this way, and certainly brings me peace.

I always do the right thing…for my own wellness.

Look up child.”

Love and blessings,

Wendy

One who is living with a mental health disorder, most especially a substance use disorder and/or an alcohol use disorder tends to isolate, sometimes until it is too late. And it happens every single day.

One will isolate for a variety of reasons including the shame that they feel for the need to self medicate, the fear that they feel of being shamed, and judged, and possibly ostricized by family and friends, and many times when they have arrived at a stage of hopelessness that is the reason for their drug/alcohol abuse, they do not see a way out. One may also fear their own emotions and feelings that they are self medicating, or perhaps may not even be able to identify those emotions and feelings, making it nearly impossible for one to process. And as it goes, they suppress. And suppress. And suppress. And deny.

And numb, and numb. And numb. And smile through the pain.

And finally, we lose one who could not see a way out, yet there is always a way out of this disease.

This is the reason that I do the work that I do in empowering our global community on mental health disorders, most especially substance use/alcohol use disorder.

The first step is to understand that these disorders are brain disorders, and are diagnosable, treatable, and manageable. These disorders are not the fault of one living with the disorder. If we can offer support through education, this is the second step, and we can teach awareness and prevention of a lifelong dis-ease, and even, of a crisis.

Please help me in my global call to action to normalize these disorders through an ongoing dialogue and education in a safe, non-judmental virtual space.

These disorders are mental health disorders. We all have mental health. There is no shame in feeling unwell mentally, and we can move ourselves back to wellness with the right support, empathy, tools, and love.

Our “Fall Back Into Wellness” Symposium is November 5, 2022. We will be offering a full day of workshops based on my “Integrative Approach to Recovery,” inclusive of all pathways to recovery. Come to learn about these disorders, and the spiritual solutions, self care practices, including mindfulness, and writing, and traditional healing modalities, including the facts about substance use/alcohol use disorders, and mental health from professionals and peers in both the wellness and recovery communities.

From the beginning of my recovery, my goal was to bring these two communities together in a “marriage” that is interconnected in order to serve as many people as we can as we meet them where they are, and support everyone in any way in which they choose to recover.

Please email me at wendyblanchard044@gmail.com for more information.

Thank you so much.

Love and blessings,

Wendy