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BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life

When God says, “No” – Romans 8:28 – Love, Wendy

Last night I prayed for God’s wisdom and Divine Intervention. This morning, I received a phone call with said Intervention. I recognized His response to my request for “an answer” in the words being spoken by my caller.

The most effective way to describe God’s response is that He stood with me “eye to eye” and I heard him simply say, “No, do not choose a new, “old” path. I am guiding you, and offering you my strength to work through this challenge. Together, step by step, we will continue on. Lean into my strength to take another step, purposefully and mindfully towards “Our” desired destination. Use this experience to offer hope to others.”

“When God says, “No,” stand in your faith. Pray. Listen. Surrender. He is creating space to move in ways that you cannot yet understand or see. “Romans 8:28 is a great reminder that in all things, God works for the good of those who love Him, and who have been called according to His purpose.”

I heard His message clearly. I exhaled in a sigh of relief as I “knew” that this would be His answer. We have an intimate relationship and daily dialogue where I am aware of what the outcome will be. Sometimes, I just need Him to validate my confidence in the “process.” As it states in A Course In Miracles, “Those who are certain of the outcome can afford to wait, and wait without anxiety.”

And so, I took one more baby step on the exclusive path that He has “called me” to “shepherd.”

Love and blessings,

Wendy

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Always and Forever- Love, Wendy

Love can be so deep between two people, soulmates…twin flames…but their core values and their strong opposing views sadly reminds us that love is not enough, although we also remind ourselves that this love is eternal. We “feel” each other’s energy even when separated in the physical realm, and we are each other’s spiritual twin so that nothing and nobody can ever break our bond.

I love you always and forever,

Wendy

I cherish these correspondence emails from you as a reminder of us.

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The Willingness to Accept Love:Surrender – Love, Wendy

The past year has been a challenging one for me. I have very recently endured a serious medical crisis of 5 compression fractures in my spine on the heels of recovering from other spine and back related issues involving 3 herniated disc’s, degenerative disc disease, stenosis, and a nerve impingement.

I underwent a bi-lateral epidural, twice, to manage the nerve pain to no avail. I walked 2-3 miles per day, and did physical therapy every day at home after my initial 6 weeks at a PT facility as exercise and movement lessened the pain. Until the fractures. NOTHING has given me relief. I refuse all narcotic pain medication to keep the integrity of my decade long recovery from addiction. I use breath work, meditation, prayer, and Motrin and heat. It doesn’t give much relief, but it is something.

I used up all of my paid sick time/personal time at work, and had to begin to deplete my savings in order to pay my monthly bills.

Recently, I learned from a spine surgeon who reviewed all of my MRI’s and CT scans, as well as a clinical diagnosis where I could not stand up or sit down in his office due to the excruciating pain, that my spine is compressed, and that his “main concern” was to go in surgically to remedy my situation. I heard words like “fuse, screws, plates.” Frightening.

It is the fractures that has kept me at home of late. I did go to work for two weeks in unbearable pain, and with each bend forward, twist and turn, sitting or standing, or walking to the restroom, and even driving the 25 minutes to and from work, proved to increase the severity of the pain from the fractures and impingement.

I was in crisis mode. My job would not offer any paid sick leave, but I could apply for unpaid sick leave where in addition to no income, I would have to pay the deduction for medical benefits, depending upon approval of FMLA, but only up to 60 days. No income, no medical benefits with an upcoming surgery, and a bank account that took a hit due to no income.

I have taken care of myself in every way for the past 10 years in my recovery from prescription drug addiction, and I pride myself in my independence. This situation came up in the blink of an eye when I awoke in pain that is indescribable and could not get up out of my bed. I could not lay down, sit down, or walk. I remember standing in my living room crying and rocking slightly to and fro because my body was writhing in pain and I could not get comfortable. Finally the diagnosis…multiple compression fractures. It was so severe that I lost any strength in my back muscles to help me to go from a laying down/sitting down position to standing up, and standing up to laying down/sitting down. Oh, and the T12 fracture also affects the muscles of the bowel…Don’t ask. Other fractures were sustained at T10, L1, L3, L4 and then compression at S1/L5.

My closest friends, my son, and one of my daughter’s encouraged me to allow them to set up a GoFundMe account. I was vehemently opposed. “It is so humiliating!, What will people think? I’m so embarrassed! I’m disappointed in myself!” I went kicking and screaming, and simultaneously admitted that without this option, I would be rendered homeless, carless, and hungry. And no, I haven’t any family to help out. The thought of me not being self sufficient was devastating to me.

I asked my therapist for an emergency session via Zoom because I could not bear the guilt and shame I was feeling about this GoFundMe. After all, I’m the one who helps others in our community, and it seemed unconscionable to me to allow anyone to help me in my extenuating circumstances.

My therapist, Jenn, said something to me that “hit me between the eyes.” She said, “You have never felt worthy of love. Can you lean into the uncomfortable feelings that you are experiencing, and just say, “Thank you,” and allow others to love you and to do for you after all you have given to others over the years?” I cried. I cried for the desperation I felt of my situation, and I cried because Jenn was right…I sometimes still feel undeserving in accepting love from others…that I did not deserve love. Or that if I allowed myself to be loved, I would be hurt again as in my childhood, young adulthood, and grown adult. A pattern that reminded me “I’m not good enough.” These irrational feelings are connected to a lifetime of “not good enough.”

I am still feeling a sense of deep uneasiness when I receive the funds from Go Fund Me, but I am also aware through therapy that this is an old dialogue of “self talk” that I have been conditioned to believe. “Not worthy of unconditional love.” I read all of the comments, texts and emails that people are sending to me, and I am overwhelmed with feelings of gratitude for the love that they are offering to me…no strings attached. And I realize that it is okay to allow love into my life. I believe these selfless acts of kindness is a spiritual reminder to me that I am not alone, and that I am loved, unconditionally.

There are just a few that don’t agree with me accepting this help, but this is a good exercise for me in surrender. Surrender to my circumstances. Surrender to those I love not “approving” of accepting help from others. Surrender to my faith in God. Surrender to love.

Every day, multiple times a day, I need to remind myself that this is temporary, that I can, and will accept the love being bestowed upon me in my time of need, and that I will once again when I am on the other side of this crisis, pay it forward. My son who is also my best friend said, “stop worrying about paying it forward and try and remember this is the good karma coming back to you for all YOU’VE done for other people. There’s nothing to be ashamed about.”

I still struggle with the Go Fund Me daily, but as Jenn suggested, I allow myself to feel my emotions all the way through, and accept the love in spite of how I am feeling.

My son, and many others ask me how I get through all of this, including the unbearable pain on a daily basis…I always say, “I have unwavering faith. I know that God did not bring me this far, 10 years into recovery, to let anything happen to me now.”

And if I allow my circumstances to be a spiritual lesson, I may be able to help someone else with similar challenges moving forward. If we embrace adversity as a life lesson, we have the ability to help/teach someone else.

To everyone who has offered your prayers, donations, your time in visiting or calling, texting, emailing, bringing food, offering rides to the doctor, etc., I am deeply grateful, and I accept and receive your love and support.

A sweet friend sent me the following heartfelt message, “Please know I pray a little prayer for you every night when I go to sleep. Be strong Wendy, let people that offer help you, as I’m sure they do it with love.”

From deep within my soul, and from the bottom of my heart, thank you, thank you, thank you.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

Uncategorized

Detachment – Love, Wendy

I’ve become so detached from those who are not in alignment with my values and beliefs… and of those who stand in judgment and extend no empathy…of those who talk amongst themselves about my choices and decisions that they do not approve of…the same people who tell me stories of other people when I am in their company. Most especially, I sever ties when one withholds love and connection as a form of “punishment…” the silent treatment or “ghosting.”

I shower those in my life with abundance of love, empathy, time and respect. When I don’t receive the same in return, I have finally arrived at a point in my 65 years where I’m able to speak my truth, to say this is not working for me, I wish you well, and I gracefully walk away, no matter who it is.

There is nothing of more value to me than my peace of mind, and my health. Any toxicity, judgment, or drama is quickly discarded so that I may remain in alignment with wellness, peace and my spiritual relationship with God.

Love,

Wendy

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Enlightenment – Love, Wendy

Saturday, April 29, 2023 8am

I awoke at around 1am with a feeling of euphoria and peace as I received what I can only label as a “download.” Pure spiritual energy and connection. I have been sitting in prayer and meditation for hours now and here is my understanding, and take away of my recent circumstances…

One day at a time, surrender, find the deeper meaning, implementing my spear and swim into wellness process, understanding the true meaning of community, the meaning of pure and unconditional love, and to stand even more deeply in my faith and trust in God, all in order to actually have the lived experiences that requires me to understand on a deeper level, on a spiritual level a “lived” experience of what it means to be a spiritual leader and teacher…to nurture myself and to allow events to unfold as I look up to God/Spirit/Universe for direction. And have faith. 

I am overwhelmed with gratitude and emotion at the outpouring of love from my community.
My earth angels…

I LOVED my work in the mental health field, (and look forward to returning to my work after my back surgery). Most of all, I loved Thursday’s when I facilitated a “living in balance“ wellness group on the Behavioral Health Unit at Nyack Hospital and on the Detox and Recovery Unit at Good Samaritan Hospital, as well as working with clients in recovery through my private practice. It was the most gratifying experience for me to connect with others living with a similar brain disorder. It helped me on a profound level and certainly gave me insight into a severe and persistent mental illness that takes one’s life and families, in many instances, away. A brain disorder that nearly took mine over a decade ago.

I sat and held the hands of many men and women in my work for those 3+ years and listened to their stories of their fall from grace, of abandonment of their families, of one man who was a teacher in the Nyack School District, and I wondered how that could ever happen to someone in his profession. Now I can actually relate to that man’s journey not just through listening to his story, but through living my experience that closely mirror’s his journey.

And although I could empathize with those who were homeless and unwell, I did not know what it meant to actually live these experiences. I spent many hours over the course of my work on the phone, and visiting the department of social services and other resources to attempt to give some relief to these patients, which is exactly where I find myself now. 

It was less than helpful for those patients, and nothing has changed in my experience this last week. Our government does not provide for those less fortunate who are out of work or homeless or unwell. When I asked a friend at DSS how do people live on the little bit that is provided to them ($485.00 a month!!!) his answer was, “they don’t. They stay in their home until the eviction process literally puts them out.” I cried. 

My closest friends told me last night that they will never let me lose my home or go without. I am deeply grateful. Surreal. I came from an amazing life, financially, as a wife and mother and teacher in an affluent community, to standing at the homeless shelter door, figuratively.

I think about the days working with patients and clients who were locked down in the hospital, or living at the shelter where I witnessed severe lack, severe mental illness and hopelessness. Some of whom were not even cognizant enough to understand their circumstances. Heartbreaking. My heart filled with joy when I sat with them and saw them look into my eyes and offer a faint smile. They were exhausted, and had given up hope.

I was able to leave at the end of my workday and go home to my beautiful condo, heat and hot water, organic food, peace and quiet along with my designer purse in hand, and to spend time with my loving friends and family.

Enlightenment.

I’m going to be just fine, and I believe as my mother used to say “This too shall pass.“ I used to hate that saying when she said it because it felt like what I was experiencing was insignificant to her. But it was how I was receiving her words and the meaning that I attached to it, and not at all what she meant.

I believe that experiencing these experiences is a Divinely guided intentional and temporary path so that I may serve our global community more effectively, and to actually live by my words that I have deep faith and trust in God as I serve. To lead by example and experience. To be a spiritual support and teacher.

This is not for the faint hearted. 

Thank you, once again, for your loving support.

Love and blessings, Wendy

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Surrender – Love, Wendy

One of my favorite spiritual teachers, Gabby Bernstein, said, “When you think you’ve surrendered, surrender more.”

Recently, I had sustained four compression fractures in my spine and could not go to work for a couple of weeks. I used up my sick days, and depleted my savings as I tried to keep up with my cost of living. Further, I am now facing a probable spine surgery, and I am unable to return to work at this time. Chronic, severe pain limits my ability to walk, sit or stand for too long.

My soul mother and another favorite spiritual teacher, Sheila Pearl, reminded me of Gabby’s quote. “Surrender.”

Sheila and some of my other closest friends suggested that I allow them to create a Go Fund Me campaign. Absolutely not! I am very uncomfortable accepting help from others.

I have always taken care of myself. I’m independent, I pay all of my bills, I do not lean on anyone for anything…until I became physically incapacitated, suddenly, abruptly losing my only source of income.

I never would have believed that this could happen to someone like me. But illness/injury can happen at anytime. And so, it was time for me to “surrender more.” As I try to process all of this that happened almost overnight, I am still uncomfortable with allowing myself to accept help from others. I applied for disability and the amount that the government “gives” to a person in my position is unconscionable. I can now understand how people become homeless, and go hungry.

My friends and family have encouraged me to allow myself to accept the generosity of others as they remind me of the many people that I have served over the years in the field of mental health and substance use disorder. “You’ve helped so many over the years. Now it’s time for you to allow others to help you in this time of need.”

Surrender.

A concept that I am still getting to know, and one that is creating an uncomfortable, uneasy feeling. I allow myself to feel it all. It is a process.

No income, and limited time left on my health insurance has given me a whole new perspective on just how fleeting life can be, and is. However, I am a rich woman in terms of friends, love, and unconditional support. I am reminded of the movie “It’s A Wonderful Life” where Harry toasts his brother George referring to the community gathering to support George in his time of financial need, “To my brother George, the richest man in town.”

I know that there is a spiritual lesson to be learned through my circumstances. Each day I strive to find the deeper meaning through a wider lens and open perspective so that I may use this lesson to serve others in the future.

Amen.

I have surrendered.

Love,

Wendy

BOOK

All I Can Do is Pray- Love, Wendy

I am constantly asked, “When can we expect your second book to be published?” I could not answer this question. The truth is that I didn’t know what I would write about.

I published my first book last year Write Pray Recover:A Journey To Wellness Through Spiritual Solutions and Self Care, and didn’t want to piggy back off of my first book. I felt that my message was clear enough in this book, and I wanted to write about my spiritual life, and the intimate relationship I have with God/Spirit/Universe, using the concrete examples that I experience daily. I will never force my beliefs down anybody’s throat, but perhaps when you hear my stories, and how close I come to the “edge” that is “mimicking doom,” and then at the 11th hour, a miracle presents itself, I am hoping this will be a “Call to Action” for more people to explore a spiritual relationship. Each day, my spiritual relationship is deepened through faith, meditation, and prayer.

As I said, “The truth is that I didn’t know what I would write about…”until now.

All I Can Do is Pray will be the title of my second book. I have 10 years of spiritual communication that represents my intimate relationship with God/Spirit/Universe. I sometimes share my daily spiritual encounters with family and friends, and they too are in awe of my beautiful spiritual practice.

I have found myself posing the questions below to myself, and looking for answers that will provide me with a deeper meaning to life, most especially, with a deeper meaning for my life’s purpose. My intimate connection with God/Spirit/Universe is my most cherished relationship, as this is where I find the unconditional love that I have sought my whole life, as well as receiving the information that I need to serve and support others. Each day I say, “Please show me where to go, who to see, what to say, and to whom, to help another person.” My prayers are always answered.

I am sharing the questions that I have asked of late as I find myself in a serious financial hardship while at the same time my physical health is compromised.

I am living with compression of my spinal cord, (severe enough to impact walking, sitting, standing, not to mention that there is a fracture to one of the vertebrae connected to the bowel and bladder, causing chronic constipation. (“The heavier the degree of vertebral compression, the higher the risk of constipation”), Degenerative Disc Disease, Osteoporosis, and four compression fractures in my spine. The doctors have instructed me to “mostly rest” for four weeks.

“What do I do now?” I look up and ask God. I have run out of sick days, used up any paid sick bank time, and have just been told that I need spine surgery, not to mention that if I don’t go back to work, I will lose my medical insurance in about 3 weeks, and have to pay for the insurance. But wait…how can I pay for insurance without income?

I have very little savings. “What do I do now?” I cry again. And as I begin to sob in disbelief of my circumstances, after surviving 40 years of substance use disorder that nearly took my life, ten full years of beautiful and meaningful recovery, and serving our global population in mental health and wellness, Spirit answers through song in the style I have become accustomed to in our intimate relationship, “Look up Child.” This is the Chapter 1 title of my book, Write Pray Recover, and is one of Lauren Daigle’s hit songs. I laugh through the tears, and I realize that God/Spirit/Universe is telling me to trust Him. I have no idea how this will all fall into place, but I am definitely being guided to trust Him with blind faith. And of course, I do. Right after Look Up Child, the track, Calm, begins to play on Pandora which is a 30 minute gorgeous meditation track that creates calm and focus as I use my breath to “calm” myself, and again, I believe God is telling me that all is well, and to remain calm. And so I will. Yes, through the cacophony of all of the noise, I choose to believe in the power of prayer and of God/Spirit/Universe. This is the only strategy that makes sense to me. Not to become hysterical, but instead to turn my energy inwards to connect with myself where I see, hear and feel beyond my physical limitations, and to connect to the truth I have come to know is authentic, loving, and ever present.

In my 10 years of recovery, I have built a loving, supportive community of like minded people. As always, I share everything that I am doing in recovery where my foundation is my daily spiritual practice. I teach, educate others, share my book, write an inspirational blog a few times a week. In addition, I have facilitated a global workshop series that was online and free for others, globally, run by myself and other practitioners and peers from around the world, to empower themselves with tools for wellness. I coach others in recovery in my private practice, and I share all of my challenges so that others will recognize that they are not alone, and can consider using my Integrative Approach to Wellness in their own recovery, or to combine my program in any way that resonates with them. I believe that the Universe is grooming me to become the spiritual teacher I have wanted to be for so long.

As I share these most recent challenges, so many from my gorgeous community have reached out to share possible solutions. I feel supported and loved. And, I know that God/Spirit/Universe has brought us all together for a combined purpose…to share our stories so that others can begin to understand that substance use disorder and mental health disorders, (anxiety, depression, etc), is a brain disease, and that we are not alone. We all have mental health. And in my opinion, with the right tools and support, together with one’s determination to live in wellness, and allowing Spirit to guide our journey, recovery begins to ripple out into the world for everyone to experience. A “global call to wellness.”

I remind myself during this incredibly scary, uncertain, and challenging time that “God saved me over a decade ago from this brain disease, and He will not allow me to become homeless and hungry now.” I know that He is using me to serve others. And experiencing these circumstances can bring me greater empathy for those who are experiencing the same. So, I welcome the lesson. And I am honored to learn the deeper meaning of my life’s purpose, and of life collectively.

In the meantime, I have surrendered to my circumstances, and I am certain that solutions will all be revealed in His time.

All I Can Do is Pray.

This is one of my most important lessons, and messages…ever.

Love,

Wendy

PLEASE NOTE: You will notice that I refer to a higher source interchangeably as Universe/God/Spirit. Substitute your own name for the God of your own understanding.

BOOK

On Friendship and Relationships – Love, Wendy

A spiritual lesson: A loving and devoted friend climbs into the muck with you whether to just hold you, keep you company, or to help you to sort through the muck to see the bottom in order to have clarity. They stay with you on many levels mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually that tells you that you are never alone. Words and behaviors align.

Those other “friends” who clearly see you drowning in the muck, who convey a message of “I’ll wait out here on solid ground, and when you climb out of it, I’ll smile at you yet, I will never offer you an opportunity to talk about the details. I will avoid the “muck” conversation at all costs. I will talk about myself and how well I am doing and/or how much my own “muck” has me stuck, detouring far away from what you are experiencing. (I probably lack the tools to be your spiritual friend or counterpart). I will dodge any conversation about the “muck” until I am certain that you have made peace with it.”

This is what we call a “fair weather” friend. Only after the muck has cleared up, do they call you or show up on your path as if they did not see or hear a thing, and yet they will continue to call you “friend.”

Sound familiar?

I have learned this lesson over and over, and although it is so disappointing, I never take this personally. I remind myself that this “friendship” is one sided, that this person does not have the tools to be in a committed friendship/relationship, and I begin to detach from that relationship.

This is a spiritual lesson where I remind myself to set boundaries, and to engage only in reciprocal relationships that are healthy and loving.

Love,

Wendy

BOOK

DEVOTION TO THE MIND/BODY CONNECTION – LOVE, WENDY

Today I devote myself to moving my body slowly and steadily without rushing my body. I use my breath to navigate the pain and resistance. I remind myself that my physical movement connected to my mental agility offers me a body/mind connection. In this space, I can create change.

There is a greater purpose in this connection.

Then, I connect to the God of my understanding, ask for spiritual guidance on how to heal my body. The answer is always about using my mind to guide my body in an integrative approach. The mind is a muscle that must be stretched every day, as do the muscles in my body that are resisting me. My body is responding to the physical and emotional stress I am enduring.

I trust that the power of my faith and the mindful movement that I engage in creates a shift to healing, and ultimately to wellness.

My feelings of pain and resistance are not my truth. I choose to shift the stressful stimulus causing my pain to my awareness of my body/mind connection. I strategically change my response to, “I am conscious of my thoughts. Thoughts are not facts. I can shift my negative thought pattern through mindful breathing and awareness of my sensations. I move purposefully and joyfully back into wellness.”

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK

I AM A SURVIVOR:My thoughts and memories of the past 10 years of my recovery from addiction – Love, Wendy

Ten years ago to the day, today, I took my last dose of “self medication” consisting of 2 Tylenol with Codeine #60 and 8mg of Xanax.

I began my intense treatment for Substance Use Disorder (SUD) on April 3, 2013. What a decade long journey it has been.

I think of the list of challenges and adversity that presented itself over the past decade, and I am in awe of my strength, my discipline, and my devotion to wellness in my recovery through “An Integrative Approach To Wellness in Recovery” which I coined and created.

This decade brought with it highs and lows, and everything in between including bankruptcy in 2014, beginning a new career as a Recovery Specialist and Client/Family Advocate for those living with SUD and mental illness, as well as becoming certified and trained as a practitioner in Integrative Nutrition, Mental Health First Aid, Suicide Safety, becoming a Board Certified Peer Specialist, Spiritual Wellness, MAT treatment, Narcan, CPR, Trauma Informed Approach, to name a few.

I have written a book, Write Pray Recover :A Journey to Wellness through Spiritual Solutions and Self Care. https://writeprayrecover.com

This interactive book/journal is based on my lived experience, as well as my field experience in the mental health/substance use disorder field, and my work in the field as an Integrative Nutrition Holistic Health Coach. This book gives the reader an opportunity to self reflect, to write about it, and to use this book as a tool for self discovery and exploration, and healing.

I am hoping to realize my greatest dream of going out on a book signing and speaking tour worldwide!

I was the Keynote speaker recently at the Chris Ashman Wellness & Recovery Conference, and I speak at various recovery events across NY state, and globally including LIVE radio broadcasts, and podcasts! In addition, I have a private practice where I serve others who are beginning recovery. I work as a part of their “treatment team” and bring my program, An Integrative Approach To Wellness in Recovery, to the solution. This is a program that is tailored to one’s specific needs and desires. It is a non linear program, and as we ebb and flow, the program continues to be modified. The client leads the team. Inherently, we all know what we need to heal. We ask for support and guidance as we explore and discover our authentic self, ongoing.

Sadly during my recovery, I lost my mother in 2020, who gave up on life, I suffered severe physical health challenges, broke up with the man I thought I’d spend the rest of my life with, and had to make a conscious choice to sever relationships that were contributing to my anxiety and overall well being in a negative way. I navigated it all without any mind altering substances, and instead, summoned every holistic healing tool and practitioner that I could find to guide me.

The relationships with my children and friends have become unbreakable and meaningful as my family and friends observed my metamorphosis one day at a time, and stood on the sidelines cheering me on.

My “integrative approach in recovery” has been testament to the fact that each of us can choose the pathway to our own recovery, and be successful when we remain diligent and disciplined to the components of said program. There are many pathways to recovery that co-exist in alignment with necessary medical supervision in the first year, at least, of one’s recovery.

On Tuesday, April 4, 2023, I will begin my 11th year of Wellness in Recovery from prescription drug addiction and co-occurring mental health disorders.

My son said to me today, “I can’t tell you enough how inspiring it is! If it wasn’t for you leading the way, I wouldn’t have made it! So proud!!
You must be super proud of yourself too! Look where you are now. Even with the pain you sometimes experience in life, you stood strong and never fell backwards. That’s amazing. Very inspiring.” And my daughter Liv said this morning, “That’s really good! I’m really proud of you!”

It is for my children and grandchildren that I continue along this exciting, albeit sometimes challenging journey. I want to lead the way in showing them by actions, not just by words, that when we actively engage our mind over the challenge, anything and everything is a possibility.

As for the saying, “When we know better, we do better,” Amen. And it is up to us to continue to learn and to evolve in order to make healthy choices and to do better for ourselves lifelong. This practice ripples out into our immediate environment as a positive mindset and approach, and offers new perspective to consider, and eventually, it ripples out into the world where we begin to see change.

I will end with this quote that I wrote in my recovery early on, and which appears in my book on page 3 and 4:

“I am a survivor. I am not my past defined by a disease that

temporarily altered my being. I am a warrior who now holds

the space for others to experience their authentic selves in the

present moment. This is a blessing and a gift. I am here as a vessel

to usher the boat away from the shore. The waves do not hold

me back as I have learned to navigate, and swim right into the

waves. I’ve learned to go with the flow, and to feel the sun lighting

my way on my journey. I live with great pride, and in peace, as

I continue to experience the ripples and waves in un-chartered

territory. I continue to evolve, poised for the next rush of waves,

with certainty of my strength, always grateful for new opportunities

to grow. I am a survivor.”

– Wendy Blanchard, M.S., INHC, NYCPS

BOOK

The more I see, the more I see – Love, Wendy

I have observed a clear and persistent obstinence, defiance, and borderline delusion from one I loved. I think about the brilliant mind of this man and wonder what would encourage one that I held in the highest regard and loved so deeply to align themselves with pure evil, and then to emualate that evil and delusion.

I used to pray for this man that God would forgive his deceit and hurtful words and behaviors. I used to pray that he would awaken. I used to ask God to strengthen his resolve and guide him to align himself with love, and to embrace the God he claims to be a child of, and of whom he follows.

I cannot believe my eyes.

Yet, the more I see, the more I see. And, the more I learn about this man, the more I learn.

I understand why God would never bless a relationship with one so defiant, misguided and unwell.

“God helps those who ask for help, and who help themselves.”

God never approves of evil.

Love,

Wendy

BOOK

Open your mind to other perspectives – Love, Wendy

There are actually some people who will “wish” for your relapse and demise, so that they can say, “You see, it can’t be done.” (Wellness in Recovery).

They have never met me.

My self created program, “An Integrative Approach to Recovery” is suitable for everyone as it combines traditional methods with holistic methods and flexibility in choosing ones wellness tools. We all have mental health, and we all heal differently. We must respect each individual’s choices in healing.

My choice was to create my own program when I realized the traditional 12 step programs did not resonate with me. I began my own business and started helping those in recovery who wanted a new perspective and sustainable program in wellness.

Click here for your copy of my book, Write Pray Recover: A Journey To Wellness Through Spiritual Solutions and Self Care. https://writeprayrecover.com

Love,

Wendy

BOOK

“Holding the space” – Love, Wendy

Giving someone space is an act of love and compassion. It displays trust and value of another. “Holding the space” for another allows them to “be” where they are, heal in whatever way and pace that is comfortable for them, and it reminds them that you are on the sidelines watching, cheering, and holding the space for them to arrive at their own destination in their own time.

“Holding the space” for oneself is just as important. To “know” that we have the support and the tools to love ourselves and to heal in the way(s) that resonate with us individually. Each day remind yourself that you are ALWAYS doing your best in every moment with the tools and knowledge that you have at this time.

Remind yourself that you are spiritually supported and guided. Remind yourself that you can always seek additional guidance and support from a trusted loved one, or even a professional. Remind yourself that your healing is connected to your experiences, and that you have the option to try additional means of healing to expand and enhance your experiences.

“Holding the space” for oneself or another is an act of unconditional love. And in the meantime, for ourselves, we live in the space of acceptance that we can only control our own space and self. In this space and action is our greatest self care.

Hold the space in a mindset of acceptance, being present, kindness and encouragement, and if needed, silence. We all heal differently. Remind yourself that there is NO time limit on healing.

“Hold a space for love and healing.”

And always be prepared to dance again in that space.

Love, Wendy

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“When all hope is gone, have faith” – Love, Wendy

When your child is hurting, no matter how old they are and you can’t fix it for them, the heaviness of their burden seeps into a mother’s soul.

For me, when my precious child who is experiencing serious challenge and adversity tells me that, “it’s OK mom, I’m going to take good care of myself because you have shown me the way; you inspire me”, that is the moment that I look up, drop down to my knees, and say, “Thank you,” to the Divine Source, and for me that is God/Spirit, who has been guiding me on my path of wellness and self awareness in order to lead by healthy example for my children.

Everything that I do, say, and act upon is carefully thought out and considered in order to provide healthy choices for my children. And in my own times of adversity, I remind myself who is watching, and the lesson that I want them to learn.

When your child is hurting, no matter how old they are and you can’t fix it for them, we must continue to do the next healthy thing to lead by healthy example. We must show them that through our own adversity and challenges, we continue to practice wellness, and to stand strong in our spiritual beliefs and practices…most especially when it seems like all hope is gone.

As I always say, “When all hope is gone, have faith.”

Love,

Wendy

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Whisper’s from the Universe – Love, Wendy

When we allow chances to learn and to evolve pass us by because we are uncomfortable with change, or we are fearful of failure, we lose opportunities to grow our grit.

Whatever the outcome, whether success or failure, it is an opportunity to build resilience, to strengthen our inner resolve, and a chance to understand what we can do moving forward to achieve our desired outcome. It is the practice test of exploration and discovery.

An embraced opportunity may even introduce an option that we have never considered, and can change the trajectory of our journey. 

I believe in taking every opportunity that is presented. If it doesn’t resonate, I will not engage again. 

I believe that opportunities that we may not “see” on our own are the Universe’s whispers to “trust” the journey.

Love, Wendy

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We live what we learn. UNLEARN it when it depletes your wellness – Love, Wendy

I experienced trauma as a young child at the hands of the adults who were supposed to love me. Trauma made me do things, and behave in ways that were just as toxic as the behavior that I was exposed to as a child and young adult.

We live what we learn.

UNLEARN it when it depletes your wellness.

When I was near death ten years ago from a near fatal overdose of prescription drugs which I used to numb out all of the trauma, it was the thought of my children that prompted me to ask for help to save my life. I wanted to live, but first I needed to clean up my addiction, work with a therapist, unlearn unhealthy behaviors, and learn a healthy, sustainable way to live that resonated with my soul. An “integrative approach” was what I connected to and through which I thrive today.

I have worked through much of the trauma, and have ten fluid years of successful recovery in wellness.

I have written a book, become a mental health educator/consultant, earned a certification in Spiritual Wellness, and Integrative Nutrition Health Coach, and I am a board certified Peer Specialist for the state of NY.

Although I endured so much abuse, neglect and trauma, in one moment of clarity, I decided to stop feeling sorry for myself and ceased being the victim.

I asked for help, I did the intense inner work, and I realize that this will be a lifelong journey, but man, I have come a long way in the past ten years.

Those that just continue to wallow in their trauma in order to play the victim, and make excuses not to go to work, not to DO the work, not to practice compassion and forgiveness, and who look for attention in a most unhealthy way are destined to live an unhealthy life with toxic people in their circle.

It is a choice. I am not responsible for the abuse and trauma that caused me to use drugs, but I am responsible to heal myself, body, mind and spirit.

When we mature, we realize that our parents had their own mental health/substance use issues, and they did the best with what they knew, albeit they did not have tools at all to provide a nurturing home, love and security. And, through my own healing work, I have learned empathy for my parents, and have forgiven them.

I am blessed.

I have surrounded myself with the best teachers in healing and wellness, spiritual mentors, and have made it a full time job to learn all that would enable me to become the woman I am today.

The more I learn, the more I learn, and I now teach others how to promote their own wellness, and come from a place of spiritually aligned behaviors.

I stand in my power. I will never again allow myself to engage in a toxic relationship where I give away my power.

A difficult journey, but I am living in wellness…one moment at a time.

Forgiveness negates the need for lifelong vengeance. It is for the ones who were the victims. Of course, forgiveness is a choice, and is a situational decision.

With respect for all those who endured abuse and neglect, I speak from experience.

My load is so much lighter. I wish that for you.

Love,

Wendy

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A Decade Of Wellness in Recovery – Love, Wendy

I have been in “Wellness Recovery” for a decade now, and I have learned so much in my new normal.

And, at the foundation of my recovery from prescription drug addiction and mental health disorders is my deep spiritual practice.

I have observed that I have the ability to successfully, with deep meaning, do the following with spiritual guidance and a loving support system:

-Engage in the most challenging and uncomfortable conversations.
-Take the road less traveled.
-Choose to go way out of my comfort zone and try the scary option rather than the safe option in order to allow myself to learn and to evolve.
-To have an ongoing dialogue about mental health and my personal journey even in my community where I live and work without apologizing for the disorders that nearly took my life, and in fact, use my lived experience and my work experience in the field to serve my community, locally and globally.

And I have observed that:

-I am brave.
-I have stared adversity in the eye, and kept going anyway.
-I have become empowered and have freed myself from the past.
-I have created a new, healthy lifestyle that has indeed been life changing.
-I have had thousands of opportunities, and embraced those opportunities to serve others.

These last 10 years in recovery through my self created Integrative Approach to Wellness in Recovery has taught me discipline, courage and self trust, and MOST importantly to “sit” and just “be” comfortable with feeling uncomfortable. It always works out because God is ever present. Each situation is teaching me faith, discipline and grit.

It has taught me how to feel safe and secure even when I am feeling lonely and afraid. To make the choices that will best serve me in wellness, albeit that some of these choices have forced me to work harder in my recovery to foster and build my resilience and grit, leaving behind people, places and situations that I believed were once in my best interest.

Lastly, I have learned that choosing to do the right thing, i.e., the healthiest thing for myself may require me to make choices that are unpopular with others, and that I am perfectly at peace with it all.

As I write in my book, Write Pray Recover:A Journey to Wellness through Spiritual Solutions and Self Care, “I will no longer go into “debt” energetically for anyone else at the expense of my own wellness. I practice self-care first. If something that I am being asked to do is going to jeopardize my wellness, or expend and deplete my energy, the answer is “no.” No regrets. No apologies. Those who are coming from a good and loving place support and respect my boundaries. If they do not support my boundaries, they are not meant to be aligned on my path.”

I am incredibly proud of my healing, and of all of my work. I am so humbled by the experiences that have shaped the woman who I have become, and whom I love and respect.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

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Welcome Home to Yourself – Love, Wendy

We need to take a proactive part in our healing journey. Self reflection and speaking our truth is the first step.

Part of our healing journey may be to accept that the love we once shared is no longer a part of our journey, that it will be irreplaceable, and yet, continuing to invite ourselves to experience happiness once again even if the journey now appears unlike what we had imagined.

It takes courage and grit to continue to move forward without the relationship/relationships that captured our heart. And, it is always our choice.

We might not have a choice as to how we are placed on a alternate path than where we were headed, but we have a choice as to how we respond. We can go kicking and screaming, or we can embrace the beauty of the new beginnings.

Speak your truth. Unpack the pain. Patiently process it all. Express your deepest disappointment. Journal. Talk to someone you trust. Practice whatever healthy self care practices nourishes your soul.

Repeat as often as needed.

If it resonates, sit in prayer/meditation. This is my greatest self soothing tool.

Mindfully, take another step forward.

Never place a time constraint on your healing. It is a lifelong process. And, we can experience joy and sadness simultaneously.

Welcome home to yourself.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

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How Great Thou Art – Love, Wendy

Watching as a man continues to “drink the Koolaid” and buys into outlandish theories of “fake people, news,” and sees his reality that which aligns with a “Q” perspective.

Once upon a time, I believed this man to be “the smartest man” I knew. I held onto his every word as “gospel.”

My “God” and his “Creator” would never collaborate. Mine is based in spirituality, faith and love.

I believe that his is based in fear and a concoction of brainwashing tactics.

So, live and let live, and offer gratitude for my God for saving me from the Koolaid I came so close to swallowing. Never ignore your intuition.

How Great Thou Art.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

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I am certain… – Love, Wendy

(SIGH)…

Change is never ending. Just when I feel comfortable and safe, a powerful wind of change emerges, and not so subtly, to remind me that I am only as sturdy as my flexibility and my willingness to change direction on a moment’s notice.

I breathe deeply, I allow myself to feel whatever I am feeling, practice acceptance and gratitude, ask God/Spirit/Universe for strength, support and guidance, reframe my mindset where I am open to the exciting possibility of this new path and person, and as the song says, “I remember You have always been faithful to me…You are always there with me.”

I am certain of two things…

That life is never ending change where we experience experiences of uncertainty, and the outcome is whatever we choose to create from the experience…

and...

that God/Spirit/Universe is always the “wind beneath my wings” and the resilience and Divine love beneath the uncertainty.

Love,

Wendy

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I Wish You Well – Love, Wendy

I have been trying to understand why an ex would continue to follow me on social media after years of deceit and ghosting.

It makes no sense. Yet, it makes perfect sense…

Patterns of an egotist.

When one who thrives on control feels a sense of loss of control, they infuse themselves as a “reminder” that they are still present. Yet, it makes me sad for them. One who knows who they are, loves who they are, and respects who they are need not come from a place of ego.

After learning that he never loved me, I was certain he would be on his way never to hear from him again.

I cannot feel respect for anyone who intentionally inflicts pain to self soothe their ego, and, I have great empathy for someone so ill equipped to navigate life with an arm too short to box with God.

I wish you well.

Love,

Wendy

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Wellness in Recovery is a Personal Journey – Love, Wendy

As we seek and continue recovery, we need ongoing support I. E., either a support group, coach, counselor as an adjunct to initial medical treatment and ongoing, lifelong support with our healthcare provider.


I have 10 years of sustained wellness in recovery, and am grateful to my coaches and medical doctors for their compassion and ongoing guidance and support as I lead the way in what I know I need for wellness. I have assembled an empathetic and supportive team to guide me.

Whether we are in recovery, or just living our lives, the best advice I can give as I write about in my book Write Pray Recover:A Journey To Wellness Through Spiritual Solutions and Self Care is

SPEAK YOUR TRUTH and ask yourself WHAT DO I NEED IN THIS MOMENT TO PROVIDE MYSELF WITH PEACE AND WELLNESS?, and WHO CAN I TRUST TO HELP ME TO ACHIEVE THIS?, IMPLEMENT AN INTEGRATIVE APPROACH TO WELLNESS, and MAKE A DAILY COMMITMENT TO YOUR WELLNESS RECOVERY. (SWIM INTO RECOVERY).

There are so many choices to master recovery and wellness. I never substitute someone else’s practices for my own.


Inherently, we know what we need for wellness.

Love,

Wendy

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Signs – Love, Wendy

Some see a post on social media, hear a song, or see a spiritual “number,” and tell themselves this is their “sign.”

This is their comforting validation from Spirit.


Whether we choose to believe, or not, is what our mind creates, and subsequently how we change the trajectory of our reality.

Whether you believe or not, that’s right.

Love,

Wendy

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WE CAN NEVER “UN-KNOW” WHAT WE NOW KNOW – Love, Wendy

We can never “un-know” what we now know to be the truth.
We can never “un-know” what we know happened.


We can only unlearn unhealthy behaviors that keep us stuck in a situation that is toxic, or with a person that is mentally unhealthy and causing us grief, and infusing their toxicity into our personal space.


We can learn new healthy practices to promote our own mental health and wellness.

And we can remind ourselves that their poor and toxic choices is not about us, but rather about their own lack of self love, their inability to feel empathy and compassion, and of the inability to self regulate.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

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“Live in Peace” – Love, Wendy

“Life is short.”
“Rest in peace.”

We hear these sentiments often when someone dies.

We remind ourselves that in fact life IS short, and to savor every delicious moment that we experience, to love with passion and purpose, and to be present to experience our experiences…

BEFORE WE DIE.

And then when one passes we say, “Rest in Peace (R.I.P.)

I often wonder when I observe so much hate and dissension between others, or one who has experienced trauma who turns on themselves, taking on blame that is NOT theirs to carry who lives a life of toxicity and unhealthy mindset and behaviors, “how can we recapture PEACE, and how I could support others who have lost their peace, and their wellness, to learn to “Live in Peace.” (L.I.P.)

Because Life IS short, and death comes soon enough where we will have eternity to rest.

I suggest that we sign a “Peace Treaty” with the ones we are at odds with for a compromise that we can all be excited about. “Respectful resolution.”

Speak your truth…with kindness.

I suggest that if we are living with the past tormenting our present moments that we ask for support as we unpack the trauma, embrace it, understand it, and make PEACE with it in a reframe that allows us to use it to build our resilience and self compassion that we so well deserve.

Who knows when we will be “called” to rest.

LIVE YOUR LIFE. EXPERIENCE YOUR EXPERIENCES. TAKE BABY STEPS IN HEALING YOUR TRAUMA. REACH OUT TO SOMEONE YOU LOVE IF YOU FEEL THERE IS AN OPPORTUNITY FOR A “PEACE TREATY.” If not, find a re-frame for that relationship, and allow yourself to “Live in Peace,” and Wellness.

LIFE IS SHORT.

Thinking of Lisa Marie Presley. Was she able to “Live in Peace” with all that she had endured in her life?

Rest in Peace Lisa Marie 1968-2023

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“Why are you single?” – Love, Wendy

“You are such a beautiful soul inside and out! Why are you single?” I was again recently asked.

After learning that my last relationship was a complete tale of falsehood and deceit, and that I was lied to/ghosted for years, I choose to be on my own,” I responded. I had been duped and bought it all at face value. Love was most certainly blind at that time.

Further, I explained that I always know what to expect from myself, I trust myself implicitly, and have unfortunately, thus far, find it very difficult to trust another man still five years later.

I now have a clean slate for my life, and if and when God sends me my spiritual soulmate, I will know.

Love,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life

Financial strife? Welcome to life!- Love, Wendy

It has come to this…

Working just to pay expenses to “exist,” never having the opportunity to live, to breathe and to experience a moment of peace…

MONEY. Or lack thereof.

No extra money for travel, home furnishings, pretty sweaters, an occasional out to dinner treat…

A new normal.

For some. You know that saying, “The rich are gettting richer…” and “Borrow from Peter to pay Paul.” Black and white. Simply no grey. No color.

Our bodies and minds are exhausted from the sheer daily chore of trying to make ends meet, unsuccessfully. Working two jobs, nights, weekends…no rest for the weary.

Our physical health and mental health are dwindling. Sleep deprived. A chronic mental and physical state of anxiety alternating with depression. Thinking of the way one “used to live” while they attempt to unpack and process the information of their “new normal.”

Others have suggestions on continuing to “exist,” but there is no long term solution to actually live in peace of mind and joy in the way that others do.

Family that has wronged a family member financially, purposefully, for their own selfish agenda, and the other family members who turn their heads and pretend not to see. Unconsciounable.

We live to pay ridiculous amounts of taxes, insurance, bills, and cost of living continues to go up, yet our salaries remain the same.

What does one do?

I do not have an informed response. I too, am at a loss, on many levels.

So, offer grace and empathy to others.

You have no clue as to what others are dealing with behind their hard work at their “job,” and behind their “smile.” They go home, close the front door, and feel despondent with yet another grueling, back breaking day behind them, and the next one soon to show up in the morning.

Financial strife? Welcome to life!

Love,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life

The Greatest Love of All – Love, Wendy

I chose to no longer make justifications for one’s toxic behavior. I chose to conserve my energy…to not deplete it due to another’s unwell, skewed and jarring thoughts and behaviors that were not in alignment with mine.

I finally chose to see the “truth,” which is that we live with completely different perspectives that will never meet head on, rather only to continue to collide.

Once I chose ME, and my wellness, joy and peace, God brought me the perfect relationship in love.

And that is how I knew I was ready.

This was a life lesson that I did not expect. With gratitude, I continue to seek God’s guidance. It has been an ongoing practice of spiritual connection, and cultivating meaningful connection with myself. I am now ready and eager to make a connection with another.

It began with “the greatest love of all.”

Thy will be done, always.

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life

2023 DAILY GOALS – LOVE, WENDY

This year my only resolution is to set daily achievable goals, and to celebrate my daily accomplishments. This is how I remain in the present moment.

I do not make plans for an entire year.

Things change, situations arise, and when I am present, I am aware of my immediate circumstances. I have the ability to navigate adversity and challenges with self awareness, self regulation and wellness practices that best serves me.

And most importantly, I follow Spirit’s guidance.

Thy will be done.

Stand in your faith!

Stay in the present moment!

Celebrate your daily achievements, and try again tomorrow when you fall short of your goal.

One day at a time.

Wishing you a blessed 2023!

Love,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life

Daily Dialogue with God – Love, Wendy

Allow yourself to feel, to experience your emotions, and if you feel called to do so, share your feelings.

Journal, talk to someone you trust, or have a conversation with God.

I find that using the following template to express my feelings, keeps the focus on how I am feeling and allows me to take accountability for my perception rather than pointing my finger at someone or something else.

“I feel ________ when _________ because __________.”

“I feel disappointed when my loved one doesn’t stay connected because it makes me feel insignificant.” I am allowed to feel how I feel.

I do journal daily, I stay proactive in my relationships by communicating how I am feeling, and my greatest healing comes from my daily dialogue with God. I am always able to see other perspectives through His guidance and love.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

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MONEY DOES BUY HAPPINESS, AND GOOD MENTAL HEALTH – LOVE, WENDY

I have heard it said that money cannot buy you happiness.

I beg to differ.

Having the ability to buy food, to pay for shelter, medical expenses, are all necessities, and definitely creates happiness when one is able to provide for oneself. And, having the ability to go out for some joy time is also a necessity in balancing ones mental health.

Losing the ability to pay for things, which in my opinion is the purpose of living…work, pay the bills, and back to work again, strips one of any happy moments. We get caught up in the moment to moment worry of living paycheck to paycheck.

Money does buy happiness and good mental health.

I observe my circle of friends enjoying their “happiness” in the form of new homes, vacations, and fancy dinners and entertainment on the weekends. And yet, so many in today’s world cannot afford to even take a sick day when they are sick because losing a day’s pay that they depend upon in order to pay those bills to experience that “happiness” is denied them.

Happiness does have a price tag.

Look around you in your community. I thought that going out into mine and offering an inspirational talk would be uplifting for many who are experiencing financial deficits. Then when I experienced this same situation, I realized that my whole life and mental health are dependent on figuring out a real solution as opposed to someone else’s rock bottom to success story whose circumstances and resources are completely different from mine. And please, don’t tell a person struggling with financial deficits and their mental health due to these financial struggles that “God has a plan.”

I am not interested in other’s “rose from the ashes” stories while I am despondent in my financial status.

I am only interested in finding happiness. That is a job that can pay my bills and maybe give me a little extra to buy Christmas gifts for my loved ones, and maybe enjoy a night out for dinner.

Keeping this very real…

as always.

Do you have a story to share? Email me at wendyblanchard044@gmail.com

Love,

Wendy

BOOK

I hear Him say, “Look Up Child” – Love, Wendy

My strength is weakened by my lack of faith after a culmination of unsettling circumstances permeated my foundation. I feel wounded. I feel scared. I crash like the unsupported Jenga blocks that were stacked diligently on my table.

I detach from hope.

He is tapping me on the shoulder to let me know that all I need to do is to be still, and to listen. He reassures me that He is making a way even though I cannot see the unfolding miracle. He reminds me to “Look up, Child” as I write about in Chapter 1 of my book Write Pray Recover.

I remind myself of His faithfulness. I remind myself that He pulled me from the grave 10 years ago, and suddenly, I rise up. I shake it off. I remember that He has always pulled me through with hundreds of tiny miracles along the way.

I grab onto His promises that He has a plan, and that I am always loved in the heart of God. I am always protected by the hand of God.

I begin to rebuild the fallen blocks, one at a time, and with each purposeful placement of another, I begin to see the whole picture.

I am safe.

I hear Him say, “Look Up Child.”

Love, Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life

A Spiritual Redirection – Love, Wendy

I believe that God guides us in order to serve others who He observes in need of loving support and guidance.

And, when there is resistance to our Divinely led support from others for an extended period of time, God re-directs our service to those who are willing to embrace change, and those who are willing to work towards becoming a spiritual student, and teacher.

Recently, my re-direction has taken me on a new path of serving, one that I did not think I would return to, but as a spiritual student, and teacher, I want to deepen my Divine connection and to continue to learn, and to evolve, so I surrender to the Universe/God/Spirit.

I am always grateful for “continuing education” in order to grow, and to lead others on their own spiritual journey.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life

Seek communication and collaboration – Love, Wendy

People treat others with behaviors and words that have been modeled for them.

This is their normal.

If other’s behaviors are unkind and reactive, remind yourself that this is their limited way of expressing themselves through a narrow lens, and in no way is reflective of you.

Seek communication and collaboration through a wider lens.

In relationships, when we collaborate and step outside the box to resolve our challenges, we recognize collaboration as a flow…a win win rather than engaging in adversarial behaviors.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK

Deflection vs. Reflection – Love, Wendy

Until I was able to look straight into the eyes that were looking back at me in the mirror that I finally was brave enough to see, I believed his vision of me.

Never pretty enough, smart enough, thin enough.
The truth is that was never about me.

I turned the mirror towards him.
He turned his back and ran away. Literally.

You see, when one has no integrity and is not brave enough to do the inner work, they deflect. 

Deflection is a cowards game.

Deflection is one’s way of avoiding ones own truth, and a weak man’s excuse to avoid telling the truth.

Reflection takes inner strength where one authentically and courageously looks at oneself, without judgement, as is, using ones senses to connect with ones Higher self, and Spirit, with willingness to create the change you inherently know is needed….as an “evolved” being rather than pointing out the defects of others.

Love,

Wendy

BOOK

THEY ARE IN PAIN – LOVE, WENDY

I love to observe. I watch people’s facial expressions and body language. I witness beautiful souls with an open space where they embrace others unconditionally.

I also witness from others rolling of the eyes, those who turn their back and look the other way when someone they are in conflict with approaches.

I know the circumstances behind the “conflict.” Almost infantile and empty. Behavior that I would expect from a young child who is being disciplined for unbecoming and unhealthy reactions followed by self pity.

I believe that there is so much dissension amongst grown adults due to fear, envy and ignorance. 

Rather than taking the time to listen and “see,” the other person, some take the easy way out.

Judgement. Separation. Disconnect.

I feel only empathy and compassion for these souls. There is something within themselves that is so miserable that they will not allow themselves to acknowledge it, process it, and to release it, and so they channel that anger, hurt, and frustration outwards.

It’s a good way to deflect, but trust me, when they are in the silence of their own space…

They absolutely know right from wrong, and their truth.

And it is painful.

Choose empathy. Pray for them.

They are in pain.

And remind yourself that this all about them, and not about you.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK

Thoughts – Love, Wendy

If there had been support and resources for mental health, substance use disorder and wellness decades ago, I would’ve had the opportunity to have decades added to my life. I am in my 10th year of recovery from prescription drug addiction and co-occurring mental health disorders. I am now 64 years old.

I see all of the amazing work being done by my younger colleagues in the field of mental health and wellness, and pine to be able to do the same. THIS IS MY GREATEST DESIRE, AND PASSION.

My business and my book, Write Pray Recover:A Journey To Wellness Through Spiritual Solutions and Self Care have definitely served others.

I wonder if I am too old to reach the young demographic that I believe needs to hear my story in order to feel inspiration and hope. Probably.

So, I will continue going forward, seeking all opportunities to share my journey of recovery through an Integrative Approach to Wellness, a program that I created and that I practice using natural and organic solutions alongside of traditional care, when necessary.

And perhaps at the right time, the Universe will provide me with the opportunity that I am seeking…to serve our global population. A worldwide book and speaking tour.

Perhaps…

Read my book to learn more: https://writeprayrecover.com

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK

Looking for a Spiritual Meaning – Love, Wendy

I always maintain that I am stronger than Lupus.

Until now.

The past week after returning back to a full time job as a Reading Specialist in a school district that encompasses an 8 hour day, excessive walking, standing and sitting (although I was given accomodations to avoid this but is unavoidable), driving 60 miles round trip, and running my business to provide mental health and wellness coaching and workshops before and after school hours, I have learned that I am no match for my diagnosis of Lupus/Inflammatory Arthritis.

The arthritis is in my spine which radiates into my jaw and arms, alongside of a nerve impingement and degenerative disc disease which affects my walking and standing. Oh, and if I sit more than a few minutes, that doesn’t work either.

I have purchased a thick foam pad for underneath my feet, 3 pairs of expensive sneakers that are listed as “the best choice for standing on concrete floors all day,” have been given a standing desk in my office, and I sit with a heating pad on my back for relief most of the day. Motrin does not get to the pain. I will not take pain medication because I am dedicated to my recovery from prescription drug addiction now in my 10th year of recovery.

I am not stronger than my challenges, however…

I am doing my best every day to remain positive, and to look for a deeper meaning…

A SPIRITUAL MEANING to my challenges.

My body needs a gentle flow, rest, love and daily physical therapy to maintain my wellness. It needs nourishment body, mind and spirit.

Instead my body is swollen, it feels heavy, and the pain is systemic. The severity of the pain affects my thinking. Yesterday was the worst. I had complete brain fog just 30 minutes into my day. NO RELIEF. The pain literally takes my breath away. Recently a doctor shrugged at me and said, “There’s nothing else I can do for you.” WOW.

And…

Instead of giving myself what I know that my body needs to thrive…

I work to live.

Many of us have no choice.

At 64 years old and living with these challenges in addition to no financial resources, I am forced to do my PT at home at 4am, in excruciating pain and through a few tears, limp into the bathroom to take a shower, put on my makeup as I brace my body up against the sink to take the pressure off of my spine, sit with heat on my back for a few minutes, carry my briefcase, lunch bag and books to the car, drive to work, (thankful for the heated seats and lumbar support seat) carry everything into my building, and by the time I get there, my poor body is reeling in pain, spasms, and exhaustion. This even after the doctor said, “Do not carry anything heavier than a fork.” But, I cannot pull one of those suitcases on wheels, and there is nobody to assist me when I arrive at work.

And, because I have no choice other than to “work to live,” I have now had to agree to take a medication that I have said no to for years that treats Lupus/Arthritis. It is a drug that is normally used for depression, but in a very small dose (10mg) I am told it treats this type of pain. “Nortriptyline works by increasing the amount of specific nerve transmitters in the nervous system, reducing pain messages arriving in the brain.”

So it is NOT treating or curing my disease, it is just a band-aid. And it is screwing with my very healthy brain…one I have prided myself in taking special care of these last 10 years of my recovery from prescription drug addiction.

Spiritual meaning??? Hmmmm…

A couple of days ago as my specialist looked at the severe swelling in my knees, she said all I can do is ice, and elevate.

WHEN??? WHERE???

And, she said I need to “increase the Nortriptyline to 20mg for more effective pain management.” So that I can go to work…

WTF…

I’ve had cortisone injections, 2 epidurals, and exercise every day walking at least 2 miles, PT, drink plenty of water, eat very “clean” with no sugar, gluten, dairy or processed foods, and only organic foods are in my diet in order to avoid inflammation, and have used every concoction of holistic supplements to try to reduce my inflammation. I have tried massages, and acupuncture. Nothing is long lasting for this type of pain.

I KNOW my body and I am expericing systemic inflammation ongoing. Physical and mental stress keeps our bodies in a state of inflammation.

I work to serve our global community in mental health and wellness which is my passion. I use my lived and field experience, as well as my book Write Pray Recover:A Journey To Wellness Through Spiritual Solutions and Self Care to offer solutions to achieve wellness. This brings me joy.

My children and grandchildren bring me joy.

However, the pain and every symptom that I am experiencing zaps my energy.

I work to live.

I go to work, and come home to go to bed.

Yet, I am still “going deeper” to find the spiritual meaning of what seems to be a life lesson.

I’m not there yet…

To be continued…

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK

Homeless, hungry and hopeless – LOVE, WENDY

When one runs out of options, I have seen a precious soul give up on life.

Homeless, hungry and hopeless.

How do we help our global community to realize that suicide is so final, and never the answer.

Our precious global “brothers and sisters” are struggling with so much, and so much of it is financial hardship. Some nearing homelessness and hunger, and some who are already living this horrific reality…in the USA.

As I live with this real fear, daily, I stand with our global community and wonder…

What is the solution…

Love,

Wendy

BOOK

LOVE AND CONNECTION IS THE ANTIDOTE – LOVE, WENDY

What has happened to us as a collective community? The people who were once so willing to stay connected and to sincerely care about how “we are doing” seem to have withdrawn.


I hear this from clients, and I am experiencing this in my own life.
Some people will stay connected, but you can viscerally feel the “arms length” connection.

Have we become so exhausted and hardened through our global challenges that we have retreated, even from those we once stayed connected to daily?

Have we become so consumed with our own challenges that we can’t even make the time to send a simple text or to make time for a connection call? To ask another “how are you” and really listen to their answer?

Well, not this woman.

No matter what is going on in my life, I will always remain present and connected to those that I love and those whom I serve…always.

I know what it feels like to be discarded, and I will never cause another precious human being to feel that way.

We are all experiencing many similar challenges and adversity, and we become a closer community when we share and support our loved ones, and neighbors.

Love and connection is the antidote.

Love and blessings,

Wendy