BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life

I CHOOSE TO BE WELL – LOVE, WENDY

In reflecting over the past few days where I experienced an opportunity to implement my spiritually aligned actions with one who has attempted to trigger me in my sobriety using the bullying strategies that triggered me to use drugs for decades, I realize that the Universe provided me with this experience to reinforce for myself, and for those whom I serve, my dedication to my wellness and sobriety.

When we stand in our power and in our truth, and we align with our spiritual practices, we are unshakable on our foundation.

I never take things like this personally. I used a positive response, wished him well, and went about my own day.

The behavior and words that were tossed at me are the owners responsibility.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life

ACCEPTANCE PROMOTES PEACE – LOVE, WENDY

When we are living with a brain disorder such as mental illness or substance use Disorder, our thoughts tell us to engage in behaviors that may be harmful to us, and may be extremely hurtful and frightening to our loved ones.

However, when we have worked in recovery for years to secure our wellness, as well as healing our trauma, and in addition to feeling deep remorse, and making amends to all those that we have hurt, albeit unintentionally, we must leave the past in the past. This is where healing takes place.

If there is a child, family member or friend who still harbors resentment and does not understand this brain disorder, we have the choice to walk away from that relationship. If one makes our disorder about themselves, we can either choose to allow continued emotional abuse, or to exit the relationship. If this person continuously reminds us of how our disorder affected them, always making it about them, and finds passive/aggressive ways to “give us the middle finger“ because they lack the empathy and verbal skills to communicate, we can choose to disengage.

I don’t care who it is or how much love I feel.

I have the right to feel loved, safe, and experience peace in every moment of my life.

And I will not allow anyone else’s behavior to infuse mine.

I am in my ninth year of recovery, proud of my healing, and thriving.

I practice acceptance of this situation.

Acceptance promotes freedom and peace.

I am free. I am peaceful. I stand in my power.”

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life

EXCERPT FROM MY UPCOMING BOOK:WRITE PRAY RECOVER:A JOURNEY TO WELLNESS THROUGH SPIRITUAL SOLUTIONS AND SELF CARE-CHAPTER 7:STRENGTH FROM WITHIN AND LOVE ALL AROUND “LOVE IS ALWAYS THE ANTIDOTE”

I began by journaling about this twice a week, only allowing myself thirty minute 

increments to do so. This type of writing can bring up deeply suppressed emotions, and it did, leaving me feeling raw and naked. It was emotionally and physically draining, and it left me somewhat weak after the severe and deep sobbing it evoked. 

Please do not try this type of writing without a professional on standby to guide you.

Afterwards, I would practice some type of self-care that was healing for me: I would meditate, go for a walk, do some breath work, etc. Later,  I would come back to my writing to “reframe” how I would acknowledge and accept what I had discovered through my journaling. Also, I would plan how would I navigate it all in the future now that I had purged it. I was all cleaned out…for now. When it comes up again in the future, I now have an awareness of how I want to think, and how I want to respond to my emotions and feelings in a healthier way. 

In this space, I found deep empathy, compassion, and love for my mother, and I have been able to find the peace that I deserve, and to energetically offer my mother the compassion that she deserves. I could not understand any of this as a child or  as an unwell adolescent and adult myself. But, I totally get it now. Mental illness is in our DNA, and is exacerbated by our environment and lack of self-care, all of which were present in my life, in my parents’ lives, and in their parents’ lives. It is familial and generational. I believe that I have been able to break the chain using my own awareness, self regulation, trauma work, ongoing support, and most definitely my spiritual solutions and self-care practices. Whenever I begin to feel the anxiety creep in, I go back to read my “reframing” of the experiences written in my journal, I implement more extensive self care practices and spiritual solutions to support any dys-regulation that I may be experiencing. I have discovered forgiveness of my parents who just did not have the tools or awareness that I have been blessed to be given and to experience, as well as my deep faith. 

I do the same when I do my expressive writing to Steve. I surrender it all. It is a part of my past. I mindfully choose not to bring it into my present or project it into my future. As A Course In Miracles states, “I can choose peace rather than this.” And I do. In that peace, I am able to connect with my feelings of love and acceptance toward my parents , Steve, and for myself.

I have realized that my mom did the best that she could with what she

knew at the time, and the tools she had (basically none), and that she

lived with paralyzing fear and anxiety throughout her life.

I love my mother, and I miss her every day.

It was the same with my father. He did the best that he could with what

he knew, and with the tools that he had at the time. Also none. And he

lived with alcohol use disorder and a severe and persistent mental illness.

He numbed his pain with alcohol and other addictions.

I love my father. I think of him every day.

And it is the same for Steve. He did the best that he could with what he

knew in navigating our relationship with the tools that he had at the time.

I love Steve and think of him every day.

And it is the same for me. I did the best that I could in navigating all

of these challenges and relationships with what I knew and with the tools

that I had at the time.

I love the woman that I have become, and I take care of me every day.”

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life

How we think determines our outcome – Love, Wendy

“Living in chronic pain and experiencing physical challenges caused by an autoimmune disease can deplete your energy, enthusiasm and change the trajectory of one’s wellness.

However, I maintain that in spite of these challenges, I still have a remarkable brain, filled with knowledge and thirst to continue to saturate it with even more. For that I am grateful. I can still think, create, and serve others.

I have a gorgeous heart filled with love to give, and a deep capacity to receive.

Even if this disease should completely disable me, I will never allow it to define me.

It is always a choice to continue on even in the most challenging of circumstances.

It is about perspective, and the thoughts that we choose to lead us.”

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life

LOVE CAN MOVE MOUNTAINS – LOVE, WENDY

“When the Universe steps in and ties your hands behind your back, there is no choice other than to surrender. Pray. Meditate. Listen. Pause for peace through the knowing that the love of the Universe can move mountains.

And, when it involves a loved one, especially one’s child, there is no choice other than to trust. Pray. Meditate. Listen. Pause for peace through the knowing that the love of the Universe can move mountains.

Pray again. Surrender it to the Universe. Trust.

Love can move mountains.”

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life

IT WAS ALL FOR MY CHILDREN – LOVE, WENDY

There is a definite ripple effect onto our children when we are living with a mental health disorder as they grow up and evolve into their own adulthood.

And, when we have the presence of mind to understand our disorder, and to ask for help to heal, we may be able to lead by example for our precious adult children.

It is a possibility. It is never too late to create change.

It takes a realization of how a generational disease continues to filter down to generation after generation until one, like myself, breaks the chain of inherent disease. Once I discovered, middle aged, that our DNA does not have to define us for the rest of our lives, I changed the trajectory of my own mental health. With persistence and patience with my adult children, I lead by a healthy example through spiritual solutions and self care.

I do not remain disheartened in my past. There is no way to change what has happened.

The only change that I may create, is one in the present moment.”

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life

PODCAST:LIFE BEYOND OUR WILDEST DREAMS WITH DENISE MCDOUGAL – LOVE, WENDY

Click here to listen! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/wendy-blanchard-ms-inhc-nycps-integrative-recovery/id1568421139?i=1000540550488

Thanks to Denise McDougal for this platform to have an open dialogue about mental health and substance use disorder/alcohol use disorder.

We must normalize these disorders in order to provide necessary treatment and solutions for this brain disorder that is diagnosable, treatable and manageable where we in fact do live a life beyond our wildest dreams.

Love and blessings,

Wendy