BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life

KEEP ON GOING – LOVE, WENDY

“Staying in an unhealthy, familiar space feels safe. It is a false sense of stability and wellness tied to a mindset of fear of speaking ones truth. It keeps us connected to disease, dys-regulation, and disorder where we are dishonoring our truth.

When we realize that discomfort is necessary to heal and to grow, and that facing the uncertainty and challenges of a situation is a necessary and profound part of transformation, we cultivate healthy change, and oneness.

We achieve wellness body, mind and spirit.

We are free.

We are empowered.

Acknowledge your truthful thought that reminds you that change is needed, and then take one step towards making that change.

Keep on going.”

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life

DISENGAGE OVER DISRESPECT OF SELF – LOVE, WENDY

“Please remind yourself that when one is disrespectful and unkind showing no empathy and compassion, but only sheer selfishness with no regard whatsoever for you as a precious soul and human being, you can choose to completely disengage. Most especially, when one attempts to deplete your energy with requests that go unappreciated and in fact, something one feels “entitled” to receive.

“No,” is your self care. No explanation needed.

Simply “No.”

Please advise yourself not to dishonor, disrespect, disown and disgrace yourself by accepting abusive and neglectful behavior from others whether acquaintances, friends, or a family member.

Boundaries are to be implemented as a major source of self care…

We all deserve to be loved, appreciated, to live with wellness, and to experience peace.

Protect your energy. This is YOUR fuel for wellness.

DISENGAGE OVER DISRESPECT.”

“Self care is the actions that we take to achieve wellness and wellness is where we stand in our power.”

Love,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life

EXCERPT FROM MY UPCOMING BOOK WRITE PRAY RECOVER:A JOURNEY TO WELLNESS THROUGH SPIRITUAL SOLUTIONS AND SELF CARE – CHAPTER 1: LOOK UP CHILD-LOVE, WENDY

“I lived in a constant state of fight, flight, freeze equipped with zero coping skills. My parents coped with drugs, alcohol and destructive behaviors…hence my own learned behavior. We absolutely “live what we learn.” And, we know that mental illness and substance use disorder are genetic, and that environment is also a contributing factor.

At the age of fourteen, I suffered sexual abuse/molestation by an ex-boyfriend, Eddie G., (who was eighteen and had already been in jail once), and five of his friends on the side of the road in broad daylight as I was walking from my home to the local movie theatre to see my then boyfriend. They surrounded me on a busy highway, Route 9W, on a cold February day, and these young men, put their hands inside of my bra, and in my underwear as they laughed and shouted obscenities the entire time. I was screaming and trying to push them off of me, to no avail. When they were done, they walked away laughing, and left me on the ground. I can remember feeling dizzy and a heaviness in my head as I sat there on the cold ground, stunned, for what seemed like hours but was merely just a few minutes. Cars were whizzing by as I stood up, straightened out my clothes, brushed myself off, and continued walking to the movie theater where I was going to see my then boyfriend who was an usher at the theater. I arrived there, smiled, and never told anyone what had happened to me that day. I now know that the trauma I experienced that day, one which I never processed, profoundly affected my mental health. And, as I have learned many years later, our mental health is directly related to our physical health. I would spend the next 40 years struggling with my mental, physical, and spiritual health, and with an addiction to prescription drugs, all in an attempt, albeit an unhealthy attempt, to numb the memories, the noise in my head, the abuse, the neglect, the dysfunction, the rage, the screaming, the threats…all of it, until I could no longer run from myself, my thoughts, my memories, or my reality at age 54.

In early 2013, shortly before I asked for help to save my life, my body was frail and malnourished as I suffered with many health issues in addition to IBD/IBS, such as a Lupus diagnosis, and organs (kidneys and lungs) that were no longer functioning normally, related to my drug use, and my brain’s neurotransmitters were all but deadened by the toxicity of the pills, and the lack of nourishment and fluids. I would fall asleep mid-sentence, could not complete a thought, felt confused and disoriented, slept all day, and stayed awake at night as I was suffering from a drug-induced psychosis where I believed I was being watched through the heating vents in the house, through the television, and through my stereo speakers. Paranoid delusions caused by ingesting over 2,000 pills a month. I was even driving short distances where I would experience severe lightheadedness and fainting spells where I could just stay awake and pull over long enough to call 911. A couple of times with my youngest child in the car, I began to fall asleep at the wheel and she’d scream, “Mom!” This loud scream would save our lives on more than one occasion.  My children paid a dear price for my addiction, physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually.”

My book, Write Pray Recover:A Journey To Wellness Through Spiritual Solutions and Self Care is my story of living with lifelong Substance Use Disorder and co-occurring mental health disorders, and my “Wellness Approach to Recovery,” now in my ninth year.

My inspirational/interactive book is tentatively scheduled for release this December! Please check back for updates, and upcoming giveaways!

Thank you for following my story. My only intention is to raise awareness, eliminate stigma, and to serve others living with these disorders, and of course, it is cathartic for me in my own recovery to share my story.

Love, gratitude and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life

EXCERPT FROM MY UPCOMING BOOK WRITE PRAY RECOVER:A JOURNEY TO WELLNESS THROUGH SPIRITUAL SOLUTIONS AND SELF CARE

CHAPTER 13 – SURRENDER

When the ambulance came to get me to bring me to the hospital on the day that I asked for help to save my life, I was in grave health. I was in and out of consciousness and in severe withdrawal from codeine pills and Xanax, and many other controlled substances, severe dehydration, as well as lack of nutrition, nutrients, and vitamins, due to a severe eating disorder.  But, when I came to, I remember feeling a sense of peace. I remember speaking aloud to Spirit and saying, “I surrender. I’m not afraid.” I knew that whatever was meant to be, whether I was to live or die, it would be. I remember saying that I was ready for whatever God had planned. I did not beg for my life, as I just had a knowing that I hadn’t been brought this far to be taken now. I “knew” that God had a plan for me because I heard Him say so when I prayed for him to show me the way out on the night before I asked for help. I surrendered. Surrender is the ultimate freedom.

This experience and vivid memory has had a profound impact on me. When we understand that we have absolutely no control over any situation, we understand surrender. Over the years in desperation of wanting a specific outcome, I had sometimes forgotten my greatest lesson in surrender where my life hung in the balance all held in the Universe/God/Spirit’s loving embrace. I would try to manipulate an outcome that I felt was best for me or that I wanted. After a short while of constant struggle, constant frustration, and constant physical illness caused by this mental stress, I was reminded that it is with radical acceptance, aligned with ease and grace given by my connection to Spirit, which would be the healthiest strategy. I surrendered to the Universe and trusted in whatever solutions were presented. I have never been disappointed in the gorgeous blessings that the Universe has bestowed upon me. Some, in fact, were blessings I could never have imagined for myself.

Most recently, I was struggling financially and thought about going back to teaching which is one of my passions and where I could earn a better living. I prayed for guidance, and through my friend, Karen’s words of encouragement, (I believe that the Universe speaks to us through others) I applied for a position. Honestly, I went into the interview very prepared, but with absolutely no expectations. I was 61 years old and thought they would go for someone younger and with more updated experience. However, the Universe is always in control of our destiny! I began seeing the city name where I was eventually to be hired everywhere! I knew that the Universe was reassuring me that I would soon have this new job and be able to crawl out of debt, not to mention have the opportunity to do the work I am passionate about within my community with youth who have similar circumstances as I had as a young girl. Who better than me to guide them?! Not only did I get this new job, but I was asked to teach at our Teacher’s Center at extra pay, and then the Universe provided me with an opportunity to offer, through my private practice, holistic health counseling working with clients in recovery, and offering my self created mental health and wellness professional developments and presentations where teacher’s who attended my trainings would received professional credits! Can you say blessing, blessing, blessing?! 

Amen! Amen! Amen!

I just listened to the Spiritual guidance that I was receiving, opened my mindset to new perspectives, (the miracle shift!), and I was guided through spiritual solutions to choices that would enhance my career, not to mention allow me to serve, which is my passion, and my mission!

The moment that I surrendered, prayed, believed and trusted in the loving presence of the Universe/God/Spirit, I received abundance!

I do believe that the years of my “wellness recovery”, my extensive training in mental health and Substance Use Disorder, Social Emotional Learning and in all of my successes within my challenges, detours, and un-successes, (every experience is a learning tool!) prepared me for this new challenge working with inner city youth who do not easily adapt to change, and who are in need of much social emotional development and TLC. I consider myself so deeply blessed, and I am so grateful. And, to create a professional development in response to COVID19, mental health awareness, trauma informed care, and racial inequity that is being widely embraced! Talk about Divine timing! My knowledge and training were being requested by Spirit to be shared with my community at this devastating time of the COVID pandemic. It was a win-win. 

Learning to adapt to and to appreciate what is, “knowing it is in our highest blessing” is acceptance. Radical acceptance. Attempting to force any circumstances actually diminishes one’s self-respect and compromises one’s self-love. It also blocks our faith. When a situation is supposed to come to fruition, and in time it does, then we know that the Universe has strategized and lovingly schemed to place on our path what was meant to be all along. Being grounded deeply in faith, and trusting Spirit although we cannot “see” the proof is the peace of surrender that sustains our faith.

I am now a much sought after mental health and wellness consultant and educator, and in addition to my practice, and my educational mental health and wellness trainings, I also sit on a coalition that serves to educate, empower and save the lives of our youth through our work and engagement in our community. We teach about substance use disorder and mental illness as we raise awareness and increase our public health approach through our language and of our understanding of the facts of these brain disorders.

Once I learned to surrender and “give over,” to Divine direction and timing, and learned to experience each experience to the fullest in order to enhance my wellness and to connect more deeply myself, to others, and spiritually, all of my highest blessings unfold organically. The way that all beautiful and healthy things emerge.

SUGGESTIONS IN PRACTICING SURRENDER

Even after a hard fall, you accept that there is no other way to travel but to get back on the bike and pedal forward. You pick yourself up, get back on the bike, and begin your journey again, with caution, slow and steady. You’re holding on, eyes wide open, ready for the new adventure, and ready to explore all of the beauty and possibilities that the Universe will place on your path. This is your ride. You choose the speed you’re comfortable with as you listen to your inner GPS (God’s Plan of Surrender), and navigate the terrain with ease, with wonder, and with purpose. You can peel out, burn rubber, make sparks fly, or just coast, but most importantly, you can enjoy the ride!

It’s a feeling, a deep and connected feeling we experience that tells us that the Universe’s plan for us, and all that we desire—a co-creation—is unfolding. We experience feelings of a source, or force, pulling us like a magnet to metal, and we cannot break free of the current. We begin to feel euphoric and grateful in knowing that all that we have prayed for as we have done all of the right things for ourselves and others, is coming to fruition in the form of blessings. If we nurture this co-creation, we will be amazed at our own power when aligned with the love and guidance of the Universe. 

When we believe that all that we have is crumbling into pieces, and we believe we have been left with nothing, we may finally surrender, and then, in that space, in our clarity, we find everything that we need.

When we surrender to God/Universe/Spirit, we are trusting that we are being Divinely guided on a path that will serve our highest blessings. We cannot see, or know, all that the Universe can, so we place our trust in the direction in which we are guided. 

When you begin to feel fear escalating, when you are stepping away from faith, ask the Universe, “What action would best serve me in this moment?” Then, get still and listen to your intuition as you connect to your loving and enlightened guides, and that of your own “knowing.”

Ask for a specific sign that will be specifically meaningful to you. Write down the sign you have asked for. Wait for it. Allow your intuition to be your guide. When you receive it, memorialize it below, or in your own journal. 

When we stand in our faith and connection, Spirit uses that channel to vibrate meaning through a variety of modalities specific to your relationship. Tune in. You will learn quite quickly the “lines of communication” that are open between you. The more that you communicate, the more Spirit will communicate. Now you have an ongoing dialogue! This will assist you in remaining in the present moment, to deepen your faith, and to guide you to remain awake and aware of your connection.  

Since beginning your spiritual practice, in what ways have you surrendered? 

How has it freed you? Served you? What have you learned through the practice of surrender? Do you feel any challenges in the practice of Surrender?

List the ways in which your thinking and behavior have become aligned since your surrender. How has your life changed as you practice Spiritual Surrender? Do you notice any improved physical health changes along the way as you have surrendered?

What modalities does Spirit use to communicate with you personally? How do you communicate with Spirit?

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My book is tentatively scheduled to be released in December, 2021! Please check back for updates and free giveaways coming!

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life

S.P.E.A.R. STOP PAUSE EMOTE ALLOW REST – LOVE, WENDY

“We all have feelings and emotions. Some days they may stop us in our steps and say, “Hello, I need to be acknowledged!” Sometimes this may be a delayed trauma response, or it may be a culmination of chronic stressors where we feel overwhelmed.

Give your feelings a voice. Honor your emotions.

“STOP. PAUSE. EMOTE. ALLOW. REST. –

S.P.E.A.R.”

Allow yourself to feel, and take whatever time you need. Practice extra self care.

For those who mean well by telling you to “Focus on your blessings! Be positive,” give yourself permission and power to realize when others do not know how to support us appropriately, and do not have the skill, or the experience and words that we may need at the time, know that they mean well. And, some may be uncomfortable observing as we experience emotions and feelings because it may force them to go within where they may be suppressing their own feelings and emotions that also need validation.

We ALL have mental health.

When we are feeling mentally unwell, we do not need to “focus on our blessings and all the positives in our lives.“ What we need is a safe space, and the time, however long that is for us, to experience the experience.

S.P.E.A.R. yourself into the experience. Ask for support if you feel you need support. This begins the healing process.

Whatever healthy practices you need to heal, do it…and take your time.”

Love and blessings,

Wendy