When we allow chances to learn and to evolve pass us by because we are uncomfortable with change, or we are fearful of failure, we lose opportunities to grow our grit.

Whatever the outcome, whether success or failure, it is an opportunity to build resilience, to strengthen our inner resolve, and a chance to understand what we can do moving forward to achieve our desired outcome. It is the practice test of exploration and discovery.

An embraced opportunity may even introduce an option that we have never considered, and can change the trajectory of our journey. 

I believe in taking every opportunity that is presented. If it doesn’t resonate, I will not engage again. 

I believe that opportunities that we may not “see” on our own are the Universe’s whispers to “trust” the journey.

Love, Wendy

I experienced trauma as a young child at the hands of the adults who were supposed to love me. Trauma made me do things, and behave in ways that were just as toxic as the behavior that I was exposed to as a child and young adult.

We live what we learn.

UNLEARN it when it depletes your wellness.

When I was near death ten years ago from a near fatal overdose of prescription drugs which I used to numb out all of the trauma, it was the thought of my children that prompted me to ask for help to save my life. I wanted to live, but first I needed to clean up my addiction, work with a therapist, unlearn unhealthy behaviors, and learn a healthy, sustainable way to live that resonated with my soul. An “integrative approach” was what I connected to and through which I thrive today.

I have worked through much of the trauma, and have ten fluid years of successful recovery in wellness.

I have written a book, become a mental health educator/consultant, earned a certification in Spiritual Wellness, and Integrative Nutrition Health Coach, and I am a board certified Peer Specialist for the state of NY.

Although I endured so much abuse, neglect and trauma, in one moment of clarity, I decided to stop feeling sorry for myself and ceased being the victim.

I asked for help, I did the intense inner work, and I realize that this will be a lifelong journey, but man, I have come a long way in the past ten years.

Those that just continue to wallow in their trauma in order to play the victim, and make excuses not to go to work, not to DO the work, not to practice compassion and forgiveness, and who look for attention in a most unhealthy way are destined to live an unhealthy life with toxic people in their circle.

It is a choice. I am not responsible for the abuse and trauma that caused me to use drugs, but I am responsible to heal myself, body, mind and spirit.

When we mature, we realize that our parents had their own mental health/substance use issues, and they did the best with what they knew, albeit they did not have tools at all to provide a nurturing home, love and security. And, through my own healing work, I have learned empathy for my parents, and have forgiven them.

I am blessed.

I have surrounded myself with the best teachers in healing and wellness, spiritual mentors, and have made it a full time job to learn all that would enable me to become the woman I am today.

The more I learn, the more I learn, and I now teach others how to promote their own wellness, and come from a place of spiritually aligned behaviors.

I stand in my power. I will never again allow myself to engage in a toxic relationship where I give away my power.

A difficult journey, but I am living in wellness…one moment at a time.

Forgiveness negates the need for lifelong vengeance. It is for the ones who were the victims. Of course, forgiveness is a choice, and is a situational decision.

With respect for all those who endured abuse and neglect, I speak from experience.

My load is so much lighter. I wish that for you.

Love,

Wendy

I have been in “Wellness Recovery” for a decade now, and I have learned so much in my new normal.

And, at the foundation of my recovery from prescription drug addiction and mental health disorders is my deep spiritual practice.

I have observed that I have the ability to successfully, with deep meaning, do the following with spiritual guidance and a loving support system:

-Engage in the most challenging and uncomfortable conversations.
-Take the road less traveled.
-Choose to go way out of my comfort zone and try the scary option rather than the safe option in order to allow myself to learn and to evolve.
-To have an ongoing dialogue about mental health and my personal journey even in my community where I live and work without apologizing for the disorders that nearly took my life, and in fact, use my lived experience and my work experience in the field to serve my community, locally and globally.

And I have observed that:

-I am brave.
-I have stared adversity in the eye, and kept going anyway.
-I have become empowered and have freed myself from the past.
-I have created a new, healthy lifestyle that has indeed been life changing.
-I have had thousands of opportunities, and embraced those opportunities to serve others.

These last 10 years in recovery through my self created Integrative Approach to Wellness in Recovery has taught me discipline, courage and self trust, and MOST importantly to “sit” and just “be” comfortable with feeling uncomfortable. It always works out because God is ever present. Each situation is teaching me faith, discipline and grit.

It has taught me how to feel safe and secure even when I am feeling lonely and afraid. To make the choices that will best serve me in wellness, albeit that some of these choices have forced me to work harder in my recovery to foster and build my resilience and grit, leaving behind people, places and situations that I believed were once in my best interest.

Lastly, I have learned that choosing to do the right thing, i.e., the healthiest thing for myself may require me to make choices that are unpopular with others, and that I am perfectly at peace with it all.

As I write in my book, Write Pray Recover:A Journey to Wellness through Spiritual Solutions and Self Care, “I will no longer go into “debt” energetically for anyone else at the expense of my own wellness. I practice self-care first. If something that I am being asked to do is going to jeopardize my wellness, or expend and deplete my energy, the answer is “no.” No regrets. No apologies. Those who are coming from a good and loving place support and respect my boundaries. If they do not support my boundaries, they are not meant to be aligned on my path.”

I am incredibly proud of my healing, and of all of my work. I am so humbled by the experiences that have shaped the woman who I have become, and whom I love and respect.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

We need to take a proactive part in our healing journey. Self reflection and speaking our truth is the first step.

Part of our healing journey may be to accept that the love we once shared is no longer a part of our journey, that it will be irreplaceable, and yet, continuing to invite ourselves to experience happiness once again even if the journey now appears unlike what we had imagined.

It takes courage and grit to continue to move forward without the relationship/relationships that captured our heart. And, it is always our choice.

We might not have a choice as to how we are placed on a alternate path than where we were headed, but we have a choice as to how we respond. We can go kicking and screaming, or we can embrace the beauty of the new beginnings.

Speak your truth. Unpack the pain. Patiently process it all. Express your deepest disappointment. Journal. Talk to someone you trust. Practice whatever healthy self care practices nourishes your soul.

Repeat as often as needed.

If it resonates, sit in prayer/meditation. This is my greatest self soothing tool.

Mindfully, take another step forward.

Never place a time constraint on your healing. It is a lifelong process. And, we can experience joy and sadness simultaneously.

Welcome home to yourself.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

Watching as a man continues to “drink the Koolaid” and buys into outlandish theories of “fake people, news,” and sees his reality that which aligns with a “Q” perspective.

Once upon a time, I believed this man to be “the smartest man” I knew. I held onto his every word as “gospel.”

My “God” and his “Creator” would never collaborate. Mine is based in spirituality, faith and love.

I believe that his is based in fear and a concoction of brainwashing tactics.

So, live and let live, and offer gratitude for my God for saving me from the Koolaid I came so close to swallowing. Never ignore your intuition.

How Great Thou Art.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

(SIGH)…

Change is never ending. Just when I feel comfortable and safe, a powerful wind of change emerges, and not so subtly, to remind me that I am only as sturdy as my flexibility and my willingness to change direction on a moment’s notice.

I breathe deeply, I allow myself to feel whatever I am feeling, practice acceptance and gratitude, ask God/Spirit/Universe for strength, support and guidance, reframe my mindset where I am open to the exciting possibility of this new path and person, and as the song says, “I remember You have always been faithful to me…You are always there with me.”

I am certain of two things…

That life is never ending change where we experience experiences of uncertainty, and the outcome is whatever we choose to create from the experience…

and...

that God/Spirit/Universe is always the “wind beneath my wings” and the resilience and Divine love beneath the uncertainty.

Love,

Wendy

I have been trying to understand why an ex would continue to follow me on social media after years of deceit and ghosting.

It makes no sense. Yet, it makes perfect sense…

Patterns of an egotist.

When one who thrives on control feels a sense of loss of control, they infuse themselves as a “reminder” that they are still present. Yet, it makes me sad for them. One who knows who they are, loves who they are, and respects who they are need not come from a place of ego.

After learning that he never loved me, I was certain he would be on his way never to hear from him again.

I cannot feel respect for anyone who intentionally inflicts pain to self soothe their ego, and, I have great empathy for someone so ill equipped to navigate life with an arm too short to box with God.

I wish you well.

Love,

Wendy

As we seek and continue recovery, we need ongoing support I. E., either a support group, coach, counselor as an adjunct to initial medical treatment and ongoing, lifelong support with our healthcare provider.

I have 10 years of sustained wellness in recovery, and am grateful to my coaches and medical doctors for their compassion and ongoing guidance and support as I lead the way in what I know I need for wellness. I have assembled an empathetic and supportive team to guide me.

Whether we are in recovery, or just living our lives, the best advice I can give as I write about in my book Write Pray Recover:A Journey To Wellness Through Spiritual Solutions and Self Care is

SPEAK YOUR TRUTH and ask yourself WHAT DO I NEED IN THIS MOMENT TO PROVIDE MYSELF WITH PEACE AND WELLNESS?, and WHO CAN I TRUST TO HELP ME TO ACHIEVE THIS?, IMPLEMENT AN INTEGRATIVE APPROACH TO WELLNESS, and MAKE A DAILY COMMITMENT TO YOUR WELLNESS RECOVERY. (SWIM INTO RECOVERY).

There are so many choices to master recovery and wellness. I never substitute someone else’s practices for my own.

Inherently, we know what we need for wellness.

Love,

Wendy

Some see a post on social media, hear a song, or see a spiritual “number,” and tell themselves this is their “sign.”

This is their comforting validation from Spirit.

Whether we choose to believe, or not, is what our mind creates, and subsequently how we change the trajectory of our reality.

Whether you believe or not, that’s right.

Love,

Wendy