I am constantly asked, “When can we expect your second book to be published?” I could not answer this question. The truth is that I didn’t know what I would write about.
I published my first book last year Write Pray Recover:A Journey To Wellness Through Spiritual Solutions and Self Care, and didn’t want to piggy back off of my first book. I felt that my message was clear enough in this book, and I wanted to write about my spiritual life, and the intimate relationship I have with God/Spirit/Universe, using the concrete examples that I experience daily. I will never force my beliefs down anybody’s throat, but perhaps when you hear my stories, and how close I come to the “edge” that is “mimicking doom,” and then at the 11th hour, a miracle presents itself, I am hoping this will be a “Call to Action” for more people to explore a spiritual relationship. Each day, my spiritual relationship is deepened through faith, meditation, and prayer.
As I said, “The truth is that I didn’t know what I would write about…”until now.
All I Can Do is Pray will be the title of my second book. I have 10 years of spiritual communication that represents my intimate relationship with God/Spirit/Universe. I sometimes share my daily spiritual encounters with family and friends, and they too are in awe of my beautiful spiritual practice.
I have found myself posing the questions below to myself, and looking for answers that will provide me with a deeper meaning to life, most especially, with a deeper meaning for my life’s purpose. My intimate connection with God/Spirit/Universe is my most cherished relationship, as this is where I find the unconditional love that I have sought my whole life, as well as receiving the information that I need to serve and support others. Each day I say, “Please show me where to go, who to see, what to say, and to whom, to help another person.” My prayers are always answered.
I am sharing the questions that I have asked of late as I find myself in a serious financial hardship while at the same time my physical health is compromised.
I am living with compression of my spinal cord, (severe enough to impact walking, sitting, standing, not to mention that there is a fracture to one of the vertebrae connected to the bowel and bladder, causing chronic constipation. (“The heavier the degree of vertebral compression, the higher the risk of constipation”), Degenerative Disc Disease, Osteoporosis, and four compression fractures in my spine. The doctors have instructed me to “mostly rest” for four weeks.
“What do I do now?” I look up and ask God. I have run out of sick days, used up any paid sick bank time, and have just been told that I need spine surgery, not to mention that if I don’t go back to work, I will lose my medical insurance in about 3 weeks, and have to pay for the insurance. But wait…how can I pay for insurance without income?
I have very little savings. “What do I do now?” I cry again. And as I begin to sob in disbelief of my circumstances, after surviving 40 years of substance use disorder that nearly took my life, ten full years of beautiful and meaningful recovery, and serving our global population in mental health and wellness, Spirit answers through song in the style I have become accustomed to in our intimate relationship, “Look up Child.” This is the Chapter 1 title of my book, Write Pray Recover, and is one of Lauren Daigle’s hit songs. I laugh through the tears, and I realize that God/Spirit/Universe is telling me to trust Him. I have no idea how this will all fall into place, but I am definitely being guided to trust Him with blind faith. And of course, I do. Right after Look Up Child, the track, Calm, begins to play on Pandora which is a 30 minute gorgeous meditation track that creates calm and focus as I use my breath to “calm” myself, and again, I believe God is telling me that all is well, and to remain calm. And so I will. Yes, through the cacophony of all of the noise, I choose to believe in the power of prayer and of God/Spirit/Universe. This is the only strategy that makes sense to me. Not to become hysterical, but instead to turn my energy inwards to connect with myself where I see, hear and feel beyond my physical limitations, and to connect to the truth I have come to know is authentic, loving, and ever present.
In my 10 years of recovery, I have built a loving, supportive community of like minded people. As always, I share everything that I am doing in recovery where my foundation is my daily spiritual practice. I teach, educate others, share my book, write an inspirational blog a few times a week. In addition, I have facilitated a global workshop series that was online and free for others, globally, run by myself and other practitioners and peers from around the world, to empower themselves with tools for wellness. I coach others in recovery in my private practice, and I share all of my challenges so that others will recognize that they are not alone, and can consider using my Integrative Approach to Wellness in their own recovery, or to combine my program in any way that resonates with them. I believe that the Universe is grooming me to become the spiritual teacher I have wanted to be for so long.
As I share these most recent challenges, so many from my gorgeous community have reached out to share possible solutions. I feel supported and loved. And, I know that God/Spirit/Universe has brought us all together for a combined purpose…to share our stories so that others can begin to understand that substance use disorder and mental health disorders, (anxiety, depression, etc), is a brain disease, and that we are not alone. We all have mental health. And in my opinion, with the right tools and support, together with one’s determination to live in wellness, and allowing Spirit to guide our journey, recovery begins to ripple out into the world for everyone to experience. A “global call to wellness.”
I remind myself during this incredibly scary, uncertain, and challenging time that “God saved me over a decade ago from this brain disease, and He will not allow me to become homeless and hungry now.” I know that He is using me to serve others. And experiencing these circumstances can bring me greater empathy for those who are experiencing the same. So, I welcome the lesson. And I am honored to learn the deeper meaning of my life’s purpose, and of life collectively.
In the meantime, I have surrendered to my circumstances, and I am certain that solutions will all be revealed in His time.
All I Can Do is Pray.
This is one of my most important lessons, and messages…ever.
PLEASE NOTE: You will notice that I refer to a higher source interchangeably as Universe/God/Spirit. Substitute your own name for the God of your own understanding.