When one cannot identify with their own feelings and emotions, or they are too fearful to do so, they sync to the feelings and even the thoughts and behaviors of others.
They may have not been “seen and heard” as a youngster, and even as a young adult/adult. They do not have the words to identify their feelings, or may be too afraid to speak their truth, and so they look for others who are excessively loud and expressive in their vernacular as they are trying to state the inner emotions that may be simmering. Often, these are people who are actually feeling deeply insecure, and who are also looking for attention (in the most unhealthy ways.)
As I observe, I notice that the louder and angrier someone is in their expression whether it is verbal, or in their actions, I ask myself, “What happened to them?”
This is known as a “Trauma Informed Approach.”
When people feel the need to be crass, excessively boisterous, and engage in unhealthy, limiting beliefs and behaviors, I choose to employ empathy.
Sometimes, it is a challenge, but empathy is a place where I understand what another may have experienced to cause them to exhibit such desperate behaviors in order to be noticed, and even loved.
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Love and blessings,