BOOK, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

Holiday Grief and Gratitude:Soul Notes – Love, Wendy

I know that I speak to many of you when I say that the holidays may bring up sadness and even grief that we have surpressed…

we miss a loved one…
we find ourselves longing for the life we once lived…
we may be spending the holidays alone for the first time…

Holidays amplify every tender place, especially when family fractures, losses, warm memories, and old joys coexist with the life you have today.

It is normal and even healthy to express grief and gratitude simultaneously. These are authentic emotions that can be felt, processed, and experienced together.

The grief reminds us of all of the love we were blessed to experience as we convey gratitude for the memories, and even for the new experiences and traditions that we have built around those memories in our new normal possibly on our own, and possibly with new additions to our inner circle.

All of us are doing our best to navigate the holidays with open hearts, remembering that love…is never lost.

Wishing you a heartfelt, peaceful and joyous holiday season.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

In The Living Years:Soul Notes – Love, Wendy

Recently, I passed through my beloved hometown where I once lived with my ex-husband and children. Driving through those streets where my whole heart once lived wasn’t just a trip home…it was a pilgrimage through the layers of my life.

Every corner holds echoes of love, family, laughter, and loss. I ached, I sobbed, and I reflected as I touched sacred ground…my own history…and my body responded with the only truth it knows: grief still lives here.

It’s been thirteen years…yet thirteen years or a lifetime…grief doesn’t measure time. It measures love. And I loved deeply…my children, my home, even the life that no longer fits.

When we revisit those memories, our nervous system relives them too. Research shows that this kind of emotional flood can trigger a Lupus flare. The immune system listens to the heart more than most people realize.

I believe my body was literally trying to expel what’s too heavy to carry anymore. With this soul-deep visit to my hometown, layered atop everyday stressors, I reached my limit.

After you’ve carried so much strength for so long…this was my body finally saying, “I can put it down for a while.”

So today, I implemented a pause point…no analyzing, no pushing through…just allowing the waves to move as I reminded myself:
“My tears are cathartic. My rest is recovery. My peace is returning.”

I remind myself, as I so often remind my children, friends, and clients:
“You are allowed to feel what you feel for as long as you feel it. There are no time constraints. Just don’t stay there for too long by yourself.”

Ask someone to keep you company as you pause, as you process, and as you find your way back to the present…

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

Growing Forward:Soul Notes – Love, Wendy

Growth isn’t about age…it’s about courage, faith, and the willingness to begin again.

Starting over in midlife doesn’t mean limitations or age restrictions whether in a relationship or a career.

It means we’re given the opportunity to choose again after earlier chapters, relationships, and career paths have reached their natural end.

This time, we choose with a stronger sense of self, and with the wisdom that only lived experience can bring. We choose what aligns with our deepest desires, what stirs joy, and…perhaps for the first time…what honors our own agency and autonomy.

Reframe starting over as an invitation: a season of growth, renewal, and fulfillment through the lens of enthusiasm and a growth mindset.

And above all, practice daily self-care to nurture your strength, your peace, and your longevity.

Note to self, “Continue forward…always evolving, always becoming…unafraid, unapologetically and with grace.”

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

Aging Outside of the Box:Soul Notes – Love, Wendy

“The partner that you choose is a reflection of you…your character, your integrity, and your truth.
Your choice reflects your own self-worth.”

I wrote those words in October of 2020, not realizing how many versions of myself I would still have to meet. I’ve loved deeply, lost painfully, and rebuilt myself from the ashes more times than I can count. Each heartbreak has stripped away an illusion and left behind another layer of truth.

And yet, some things remain the same. I still believe that the people we choose mirror our own belief in what we deserve. I’ve chosen men who reflected both my light and my unhealed wounds. I’ve chosen love that challenged me to finally see my worth beyond what anyone else could give.

I still want to fall in love, travel, write, laugh until my stomach hurts, and dance in my kitchen. I still believe that someone will love me for the fire in my heart and the depth of my soul, not for the number on my birth certificate.

I’ve earned every one of these years…and I’m going to live them boldly, in living color, with music, with meaning…with deliberate animation and purpose.

“You cannot yell at a seed to force it to grow quickly. Instead, you love and nurture it. You meet all of its needs, and slowly, deliberately, it blooms into a beautiful flower. Find peace within yourself. Continue to stay grounded in faith, emulate gratitude, and practice patience. Go to a place of acceptance, and everything you desire will be waiting for you there.”
— Write Pray Recover

Through gratitude, prayer, and self-care, we remember that our spirit never ages…

it simply expands.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

Science Meets Soul:Soul Notes – Love, Wendy

I use writing as a tool for healing.
When we write down what we are feeling internally, it activates a part of the brain called the Reticular Activating System (RAS).
Writing with pen and paper stimulates this system, which filters the information our brain needs to process and supports my healing journey.
I teach about RAS in all of my mental health and wellness workshops, and I follow my knowledge into action by integrating evidence-based wellness strategies that reinforce intentional practices to retrain the brain toward calm, clarity, and healing.
This is the foundation of my holistic and integrative healing journey.

Carrying Lupus pain day after day is incredibly heavy…showing up, staying open, doing everything possible to heal and being unable to sleep…is completely exhausting in a way that most people can’t comprehend. 

When your body keeps screaming despite all your effort, it’s not just physical pain anymore; it’s heartbreak, frustration, and grief for the life I want back where I don’t have to be mindful of every move, every position, every activity and where I can make and keep plans with family and friends, or to not have to drop a course that I registered for because even sitting at home on the computer and then completing assignments is too painful after working a full day

The doctors tell me I need to give it 8-12 weeks. It has only been 3 since I began treatment. 

I pray for strength. I pray for patience and for grace…one breath at a time…

I continue to remind myself that I have been here before, and Lupus did go into remission.

I write. I process. I heal…

This is what resilience looks like in real time…messy, painful, faithful. One breath, one word, one day at a time.

The Reticular Activating System helps us reframe, refocus, and retrain the brain. Writing activates healing from within…

Science meets soul.

For anyone walking through invisible pain—you are not alone.

Healing asks for patience, and faith holds the light when strength runs low.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

Harmonious Health 4 Life, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

“Power With” vs “Power Over” – Love, Wendy

Living with Lupus requires an awareness of one’s needs, especially in the midst of a flare…”power with” vs “power over…”

Surrender…

Not as giving up, but as trusting your body’s wisdom and allowing yourself to be cared for by rest and grace.

On the days when Lupus is “LOUD,” I reframe with a mindset of, “power with” rather than “power over…”

It’s the essence of honoring my body as a partner in healing rather than a battle to win.

As I continue to stabilize, I honor my resilience, I reclaim my strength, and I cultivate wellness.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

Creating Wealth:Soul Notes – Love, Wendy

There was a time in my life when I could buy anything I wanted, travel anywhere I desired, and surround myself with all the outer symbols of success. By every worldly measure, I was wealthy. Yet inside, I was spiritually bankrupt, physically depleted, and emotionally exhausted. My soul was starving for something that money could never buy…love, peace, and genuine connection.

The more I tried to fill the emptiness with things, the emptier I became.

I learned that material wealth without inner wellness is poverty of the spirit.

Today, and for the past 13 years, I define wealth as balance, harmony, and nourishment. Wealth is waking up with purpose. It’s the freedom to rest when I’m tired, to love without fear, and to speak truth from my heart.It’s laughter with family, a gentle sunrise, and faith that sustains me through pain.

True wealth is not what I own…it’s who I’ve become through the healing.
True wealth isn’t found in possessions, but in presence, meaning and love and experiencing joy even during life’s challenges.

If you have your health, you are wealthy.

If you have loving family and friends, you are wealthy.

If you have a job or career that you love and where you can earn a living, you are wealthy.

If you allow yourself to love, and if you are loved, you are wealthy.

If you have a spiritual practice that nourishes and supports you, you are wealthy.

Wealth should never be measured in dollars and cents, or in “stuff.”

Wealth is the daily nourishment that feeds us body, mind and spirit.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life, Write Pray Recover

Fear Is A Liar – Love, Wendy

As so many people are finding it challenging to navigate our current culture and climate due to our liberties and freedom being snatched, daily, I have created some easy to use, daily reminders, to keep us focused on our health, wellness and peace using our own personal agency and autonomy through constructive action…because we absolutely have choices…and because “Fear Is A Liar…”

Each morning, I will allow myself 30 minutes to validate how I am feeling, to practice radical acceptance of world events, and to grieve the loss I feel of all that has been stripped of my freedom. 

I will then leave it there on the shelf until the next morning, and continue about my day with conviction and purpose in obtaining my goals…unapologetically!

Never at night before bed. Before bed, I will remind myself that my fear is spewing a narrative based on that day’s events and my worst fear of demise, without fact. 

Every day, I will remind myself to protect my peace and wellness so that I will be in full health physically and mentally in order to live, laugh, love and learn, and that positive change is inevitable.

I will remind myself that I have no power over helping others in this crisis. I will focus solely on my own well-being and send loving thoughts to anyone else struggling. When my wellness cup is full, I am able and willing to support others. I will not cause myself emotional or physical bankruptcy where I will deplete my necessary innate resources that I need to reach my goals, to live my best life in these challenging times, and so that I may invest in my future, and in the future of my loved ones.

I will use my breath to regulate my emotions, and remind myself that I can always choose peace rather than my catastrophic thoughts. (Breathe in deeply 4, hold for 2, exhale 6.)

Each day, I will choose a word of the day that describes my victories to remind myself of my strong will and mindset.

Lastly, I remind myself that I can always call a trusted friend or loved one for support, and that I am loved by the Universe who is dedicated to helping me to achieve my goals. I will listen for spiritual guidance and ask for spiritual support whenever I need a loving reminder that all is well.

I am never alone. ❤️

Use one or all of the above as a personal mantra to connect to your inner strength and balance.

In these troubling and uncertain times, I am sending my love, hugs and support for your well being…body, mind and spirit.

Take care of yourself. Never give away your power by depleting your mental and physical strength to circumstances beyond what you can control.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life, Write Pray Recover

Agency, Autonomy and Action – Love, Wendy

Each day we are given opportunities to decide…will we remain silent, or will we speak up for our bodies, our wellness, and our peace? Self-advocacy begins the moment we choose courage over compliance.

What is self-advocacy and courage when our wellness is at stake?

You protect your body, and you stand in your truth despite the silence and resistance of others who are indifferent to your needs.

It takes tremendous discipline…the kind rooted in self-respect and self-preservation.

Never allow fear of authority stop you from demanding what you deserve…safety, dignity, and humane treatment.

Use your voice with strength and clarity. Speak your truth…

Stand in your power…Use personal agency and autonomy to demand what is rightly yours…

Health, wellness and peace.

Self care is the actions that we take to achieve wellness…and wellness is where we stand in our power.

Love and blessings,

Wendy