BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

Egoic Leadership: When Power Replaces Purpose – Love, Wendy

There are moments when we witness behavior that contradicts every value we hold sacred…kindness, collaboration, respect. When this happens in our world, our communities or our circles of influence, it can leave us questioning what leadership truly means, and how we can preserve our own light amid the shadows.

True leadership never thrives on division or control.
When someone stirs the pot, targets others without cause, and spreads friction instead of collaboration, that’s not leadership…it’s ego desperately wanting to be seen and heard…yet futile.

Many quietly compare notes, feeling the sting of this behavior yet fearful to speak their truth. And those who should hold this person accountable often look away.

A real leader lifts others, models respect, and creates a safe space for every voice to be heard. When domination, division, and fear replace service, unity, and care, ego has taken the throne. #NOKINGSNOQUEENS
This is control over compassion versus living with compassion over conflict—the latter of which is innate. Those who need control live with feelings of inadequacy and jealousy; they crave the spotlight to ‘feel’ in control, but this is the furthest thing from the truth. It’s an illusion that exists only in an unwell mind and with a hunger for real inclusion and acceptance.

When toxicity replaces teamwork, it’s time for the collective to rise…stronger, wiser, and united in integrity.

Shake it off. Reclaim your peace. #NOKINGSNOQUEENS

Even in the presence of discourse and division where one demoralizes and diminishes, we have a choice to remain rooted in dignity.

Leadership begins within: how we treat others, how we respond to conflict, and how we protect our peace. I no longer choose compassion over conflict with those who abuse their power; I choose character over conflict.

When we lead with character, we become the real leader that guides others back to kindness.

How we lead reveals our character…

And it has.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

#NOKINGSNOQUEENS

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

Science Meets Soul:Soul Notes – Love, Wendy

I use writing as a tool for healing.
When we write down what we are feeling internally, it activates a part of the brain called the Reticular Activating System (RAS).
Writing with pen and paper stimulates this system, which filters the information our brain needs to process and supports my healing journey.
I teach about RAS in all of my mental health and wellness workshops, and I follow my knowledge into action by integrating evidence-based wellness strategies that reinforce intentional practices to retrain the brain toward calm, clarity, and healing.
This is the foundation of my holistic and integrative healing journey.

Carrying Lupus pain day after day is incredibly heavy…showing up, staying open, doing everything possible to heal and being unable to sleep…is completely exhausting in a way that most people can’t comprehend. 

When your body keeps screaming despite all your effort, it’s not just physical pain anymore; it’s heartbreak, frustration, and grief for the life I want back where I don’t have to be mindful of every move, every position, every activity and where I can make and keep plans with family and friends, or to not have to drop a course that I registered for because even sitting at home on the computer and then completing assignments is too painful after working a full day

The doctors tell me I need to give it 8-12 weeks. It has only been 3 since I began treatment. 

I pray for strength. I pray for patience and for grace…one breath at a time…

I continue to remind myself that I have been here before, and Lupus did go into remission.

I write. I process. I heal…

This is what resilience looks like in real time…messy, painful, faithful. One breath, one word, one day at a time.

The Reticular Activating System helps us reframe, refocus, and retrain the brain. Writing activates healing from within…

Science meets soul.

For anyone walking through invisible pain—you are not alone.

Healing asks for patience, and faith holds the light when strength runs low.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

Harmonious Health 4 Life, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

“Power With” vs “Power Over” – Love, Wendy

Living with Lupus requires an awareness of one’s needs, especially in the midst of a flare…”power with” vs “power over…”

Surrender…

Not as giving up, but as trusting your body’s wisdom and allowing yourself to be cared for by rest and grace.

On the days when Lupus is “LOUD,” I reframe with a mindset of, “power with” rather than “power over…”

It’s the essence of honoring my body as a partner in healing rather than a battle to win.

As I continue to stabilize, I honor my resilience, I reclaim my strength, and I cultivate wellness.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life, Write Pray Recover

Fear Is A Liar – Love, Wendy

As so many people are finding it challenging to navigate our current culture and climate due to our liberties and freedom being snatched, daily, I have created some easy to use, daily reminders, to keep us focused on our health, wellness and peace using our own personal agency and autonomy through constructive action…because we absolutely have choices…and because “Fear Is A Liar…”

Each morning, I will allow myself 30 minutes to validate how I am feeling, to practice radical acceptance of world events, and to grieve the loss I feel of all that has been stripped of my freedom. 

I will then leave it there on the shelf until the next morning, and continue about my day with conviction and purpose in obtaining my goals…unapologetically!

Never at night before bed. Before bed, I will remind myself that my fear is spewing a narrative based on that day’s events and my worst fear of demise, without fact. 

Every day, I will remind myself to protect my peace and wellness so that I will be in full health physically and mentally in order to live, laugh, love and learn, and that positive change is inevitable.

I will remind myself that I have no power over helping others in this crisis. I will focus solely on my own well-being and send loving thoughts to anyone else struggling. When my wellness cup is full, I am able and willing to support others. I will not cause myself emotional or physical bankruptcy where I will deplete my necessary innate resources that I need to reach my goals, to live my best life in these challenging times, and so that I may invest in my future, and in the future of my loved ones.

I will use my breath to regulate my emotions, and remind myself that I can always choose peace rather than my catastrophic thoughts. (Breathe in deeply 4, hold for 2, exhale 6.)

Each day, I will choose a word of the day that describes my victories to remind myself of my strong will and mindset.

Lastly, I remind myself that I can always call a trusted friend or loved one for support, and that I am loved by the Universe who is dedicated to helping me to achieve my goals. I will listen for spiritual guidance and ask for spiritual support whenever I need a loving reminder that all is well.

I am never alone. ❤️

Use one or all of the above as a personal mantra to connect to your inner strength and balance.

In these troubling and uncertain times, I am sending my love, hugs and support for your well being…body, mind and spirit.

Take care of yourself. Never give away your power by depleting your mental and physical strength to circumstances beyond what you can control.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life, Write Pray Recover

Agency, Autonomy and Action – Love, Wendy

Each day we are given opportunities to decide…will we remain silent, or will we speak up for our bodies, our wellness, and our peace? Self-advocacy begins the moment we choose courage over compliance.

What is self-advocacy and courage when our wellness is at stake?

You protect your body, and you stand in your truth despite the silence and resistance of others who are indifferent to your needs.

It takes tremendous discipline…the kind rooted in self-respect and self-preservation.

Never allow fear of authority stop you from demanding what you deserve…safety, dignity, and humane treatment.

Use your voice with strength and clarity. Speak your truth…

Stand in your power…Use personal agency and autonomy to demand what is rightly yours…

Health, wellness and peace.

Self care is the actions that we take to achieve wellness…and wellness is where we stand in our power.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life, Write Pray Recover

Resilience:For Wendy and David – Love, Wendy

I was thinking on my way home from work yesterday that living in chronic pain is so humbling…I can never take one moment for granted…

I live with Lupus and hadn’t needed regular medication in five years as I managed it holistically…until now.

Living with chronic pain makes the small things feel sacred…the details more palatable…every quiet, manageable moment becomes a gift.

Our awareness of our humility is our deepest strength.

Here are four tiny practices that honor this insight without asking for more than you can give while you’re navigating any challenging situation with your health:

  1. One-breath gratitude once tonight before sleep. Take one long, slow inhale, and on the exhale name one small yet meaningful thing from today that made you feel stronger and at peace (a warm shower, a walk on the beach, a song you liked). That single moment trains the brain to notice tiny graces and successes. It reminds us of our power.

2. A moment of kindness to the body. Put a warm hand over your injured/painful area, soften your jaw, breathe 4 inhale, 1 hold it, 6 exhale…just once, and say aloud or silently to yourself, “I did what I could today. I showed up. I honored myself. I am worthy. I am healing.”

3. A “Humility Journal” (30 seconds). When you have a spare 30 seconds, jot down one word that describes what this day taught you (humility, steadiness, courage, patience). It’s just a quiet record by you, for you, of how you keep showing up.

4. Reflection and Warm Embrace. (From my book, Write Pray Recover:A Journey To Wellness Through Spiritual Solutions and Self Care “Today I am grateful for…”
Offer yourself a hug, a warm cup of your favorite beverage, time listening to your favorite music, or whatever a “self embrace” feels like for you…Love yourself.

You’re allowed to see the grief and feel the frustration, and the lesson at the same time.

I am resilient. I am becoming…

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life, Write Pray Recover

I Am Not Invisible – Love, Wendy

The “invisible” nature of lupus flares can make it hard for others to understand the severity of the illness, leading to misinterpretations and lack of support. 

“Lupus is a disease where the immune system mistakenly attacks healthy tissues and organs, including causing “Lupus Fog/Brain Fog.” It can affect any part of the body. When lupus affects the spine, the immune response attacks normal proteins, leading to joint and nerve destruction, bone loss, inflammation, and swelling. As damage occurs, your spinal discs are less able to absorb shock, which can lead to the pain associated with DDD.” (Degenerative Disc Disease).

And this is my diagnosis…Lupus (SLE), and DDD.

Due to a surgery in July, 2025, Lupus was activated, and I have been unable to recover thus far. Prior to that surgery, I was footloose and fancy free. 😊

Recently I read about a woman experiencing a flare who wrote: “For me, I may see a rash appear on my face and I know this is the beginning of a flare. Friends, family, and co-workers often can’t begin to understand that the rash is the beginning of what is taking place on the inside. You appear okay, aside from the rash, but fatigue and pain can be an overwhelming challenge.

Recently, I went to an event and I looked like the healthiest version of wellness with my hair, nails, and makeup done flawlessly, and smiling and greeting other attendees. I was experiencing a tremendous amount of pain, and I could literally feel my legs beginning to swell, in fact, you could see my knee swelling through my pants. The burning and sharp pain shooting down my legs and in my back, in addition to my hands beginning to stiffen and swell was obvious. After about 15 minutes, a friend walked over and asked if I was okay as she noticed my demeanor had changed from when I had arrived. I told her that I really needed to go home, and I quietly made my exit, making this disease even more invisible. I always feel that I am making others uncomfortable when I am experiencing pain. I am often told by friends and family that they would have never know I was in pain because “you look so healthy.”

Lupus IS invisible. If I am not limping, one would never guess that every joint, from my arms, hands, fingers, and legs, are so swollen and in pain. I think the lupus community as a whole experiences this invisible pain.

Yesterday I arrived to work at 7:15 am, and felt confident that my Lupus was going back into remission, but by noon, after I had walked excessively, sat, stood, bent down, twisted, (all the things I was told by my doctors NOT to do), I could barely stand up. The pain was so intense, it caused me to feel sick to my stomach. When it was time to leave at 3:15pm, I was completely swollen and could only slide my left leg as I walked to my car because the swelling would not allow me to bend/step…

The great news?…

Today, I begin a new treatment…I pray that my body responds favorably.

I love my work as a Reading Specialist, a Mental Health and Wellness Educator and Coach, and love spending time with loved ones, so I am praying that the excruciating pain and profuse swelling is alleviated with this new treatment. My treatment consists of an integrative approach which is what my book, Write Pray Recover:A Journety To Wellness Through Spiritual Solutions and Self Care, encourages.

The marriage of holistic solutions and traditional medicine offers a variety of treatment tailored to my health and wellness goals.

And please know that Lupus flares ARE invisible. Your smile and empathy encourage me to keep going.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

For more information on Lupus, go to https://www.lupus.org

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

Living with Lupus And Thriving in Recovery – Love, Wendy

Living with lupus requires a great deal of determination and patience and willingness to listen to what your body needs and what it’s asking for…especially when you are an otherwise active person and your body just…S-T-O-P-S…

And if that isn’t enough to embrace…when you are living in recovery from prescription drug addiction, as I am, it is even more of a mindful experience where I must choose only what will promote my wellness, as I do not accept any prescriptions that contain codeine and the like as that was my addiction…

So in the past 13 years of my “Wellness In Recovery…” I have learned many alternative solutions to soothe chronic pain and anxiety which I choose every time…and I am open to an integrative approach, as I write about in my book, Write Pray Recover:A Journey To Wellness Through Spiritual Solutions and Self Care.

For me, as I continue to heal from a serious Lupus flare, I am choosing non-narcotic prescription meds that my rheumatologist has prescribed including steroids, in conjunction with my holistic practices such as gentle stretching, yoga poses, gentle walking, and of late, learning a little bit about Qi-Gong. One of my mantra’s is “Mindset over Movement…Movement over Medication.”

In addition, I do a significant amount of breath work to literally breathe in, or lean into the pain rather than tense up my joints and muscles where my body is able to relax as I use my mantra, “With each breath and step I take, I am healing.”

Organic foods, hydration, meditation/prayer, and surrounding myself with loved ones are just as important in promoting my own wellness.

My ongoing recovery from addiction and my desire for thriving in wellness is my most important intention and purpose. It is the foundation of my life.

Lupus is so unpredictable and this flare was triggered by a disc herniation and nerve impingement. Lupus invaded all of my joints and muscles, and halted any movement of my body…and in the moment that I realized that I could no longer move freely…I surrendered. (Read Chapter 13-“Surrender:The Peace of Knowing”) in my book.

I am moving slowly these days with purpose. Lupus is slowly subsiding…I am regaining my strength…And through the stiffness and heaviness, I choose to move. I am able to move. I set an intention to move and to be cognizant of how much my body is able to sustain…and then I rest accordingly.

I use deliberate breath work, and I listen and feel what my body has the ability to do each day…and sometimes it changes throughout the day…and I honor whatever that looks like.

For someone else, the right balance of care may look different, and I encourage you to find what resonates with you under the “umbrella” of healing, and implement it into your daily practices.

My wellness is my most important tool…through self care of healthy practices and a mindset of “With each breath and step I take, I am healing.”

From my book, Chapter 4:Self Care…“Think of it as you would your bank account. You must continue to replenish your bank account as your bills come in each month, otherwise your account becomes depleted, or even bankrupt. You must think of your wellness account in the same way! We have so many demands on our time and energy each day. If we do not replenish our wellness account, and we continue to “give out” our energy to all of the demands, we will go into debt, energetically, and become physically, mentally and spiritually bankrupt.”

“We must make the time for ourselves, through healthy practices, to experience wellness.” Wellness is ALWAYS a choice. My choice is to always live each day through healthy practices that support my health and wellness goals year round so that my body remembers exactly how to heal when I experience a flare. The brain remembers the rhythm of resilience, and it signals the body to return to balance, peace, and healing.

“Self care is the actions that we take to achieve wellness, and wellness is where we stand in our power!”

“With each breath and step I take, I am healing.”

Love and blessings,

Wendy

Author Bio

Wendy Blanchard, M.S., INHC is an author, speaker, and Integrative Nutrition Health Coach specializing in holistic wellness and recovery. She is the author of Write Pray Recover: A Journey To Wellness Through Spiritual Solutions and Self Care and is currently writing her second book, Soul Notes. Wendy is passionate about guiding others to sustainable wellness through spiritual solutions, self-care, and integrative practices.

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

What’s Your Story? – Soul Notes – Love, Wendy

Our minds are always speaking at us…to us…chattering words and stories that are on a loop of repeat, and that which we have internalized. 

The stories you tell yourself shape how you feel, how you see others, how you witness your environment…and how you behave.

These inner narratives can either promote joy and wellness using dis-cernment…or they can promote dis-order, dis-ease, dis-appointment and dis-illusion…

These stories can also influence the choices that you make…it can make you question your worth…

Today, ask yourself…”Which of these narratives serve me? Are they fact or fiction?

Am I just used to telling this story so often that I have come to believe the narrative that was perhaps originally spoken by someone else? Which stories are keeping me stuck? Do I want to continue to tell this story? How does it make me feel as I share my story? What would a gentle rewrite sound like, look like, feel like?

When we understand that our inner dialogue is created by our instilled beliefs, judgments, memories, fears and even our hopes, and that they are not necessarily truth, we take back our power to be able to write a new narrative. 

When we recognize that these stories are subjective and interpreted by our experiences, our culture and even our emotions…we have the awareness of their origin, and have the opportunity to take the first step in our own transformation.

And…transformation does not suggest that we ignore the reality of our experiences. It suggests that we choose a wider lens where we observe ourselves in our experiences with self compassion and even curiosity as to the possibilities of the meaning of these experiences. 

When we use forward thinking and use discernment to internalize meaning…we provide ourselves with a narrative of a “growth mindset” versus a “fixed mindset” or, where “A fixed mindset can physically prevent you from learning from mistakes, while a growth mindset can empower you to perceive mistakes as learning”…where change is a choice.

Ask yourself, 

“What narrative do I want to tell myself moving forward? How does this new narrative support a growth mindset and my well-being?”

Mantra:
I am learning to use discernment for a more forward thinking, wider lens of my experiences that promotes self nurturing, self compassion and self empowerment.

Love and blessings,

Wendy