Author: wendyblanchard044

Author, Mental Health and Wellness Educator, Board Certified Peer Specialist in mental health and substance use disorder, Integrative Nutrition Health Coach
BOOK

Love yourself – Love, Wendy

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Chronic disappointment of a loved one born of expectations and the human need and desire for love, will lead to learned permanent indifference and detachment. It is the way our brain protects us from further emotional pain.

We cannot expect others to love us in the way that we love. When we continue to go back to a dry well, we eventually become depleted and dehydrated…thirsting for love that is unavailable.

Give yourself the love that you thirst for, and surround yourselves with those whose cup runneth over… in love.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

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Keep it simple – Love, Wendy

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What happens if we don’t try to control the outcome?

We release the illusion that we have any control, and we experience enlightenment. We open a pathway to a plethora of possibilities that is in alignment with our simplest human condition…

That is…

We experience spirituality, love, connection, peace and true happiness.

Follow the road to the path of least resistance.

Keep it simple.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

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I Observe in Wonder – Love, Wendy

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I observe those around me that feed and even thrive on toxic narratives.

I observe and wonder what those who mindfully engage in these narratives must have lived through that they must speak evil falsehoods against others to deflect from the way that they feel about themselves.

I observe and I feel sad for their inner conflict.

I observe and shake my head in disbelief as their anger at themselves purposefully misfires at an innocent bystander.

These are the souls who are spiritually disconnected.

I observe.

I wonder.

I pray.

I create a safe space around me filled with empathy, forgiveness and love.
I inhale, and I exhale my thoughts of compassion out into the world.

If we are truly present, the most invaluable and priceless gift that we can offer to our global community is one where we mindfully turn toxicity into peace, love and wellness using our thoughts and our energy.

I believe that hate and jealousy is innate and deep rooted anger towards oneself, and self judgement of their thoughts and decisions. Perhaps even envy of another that they desire to be, but have not yet found their spiritual connection.

And I hold the space for the healing of these precious and misguided souls.

“What our world needs now is love.” And we can tap into that love through an intrinsic connection to self and to the Universe.

Love,

Wendy

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God cannot save everyone – Love, Wendy

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God cannot save everyone.

Even through constant prayer, I have seen for years that one I love has reached the point of no return. Angry. Judgemental. Unyielding. Unforgiving. Brainwashed by the masses.

This often takes place in the psyche of one who lacks self worth, self esteem, self regulation and awareness, and cannot regulate their emotions when it comes to social awareness. And it is prevalent in relationships where this “lack of” takes the form of toxicity that breeds chronic uncertainty and fear, that which becomes unsustainable.

This often takes place where a soul does not “know God.”

I know that God offers us options. He loves us unconditionally. He opens doors that lead to healthy choices, healing and redemption. Doors that lead to love, and a life filled with peace, joy and connection. A life where we have the opportunity to be connected, protected and guided by our loving God.

And in some cases, as I have said many times, “You can only lead the horse to the water.”

I prayed for him for years. I wanted to believe he was the man he pretended, or even wanted to be, only to be shown, by our loving God, the truth…day after day, year after year.

I still pray for her because I believe she is at a crossroads and about to turn the corner. I love my daughter deeply and I believe she will walk through an open door invitation before it is too late. #sheismydaughter

There is so much truth in the saying, “God helps those who help themselves.”

After all, look at me. Getting ready to enter my 12th year of recovery from addiction. I crawled through the door very near to my death, where God helped me up, and showed me the way, and I never looked back.

“There before the grace of God go I.”

God cannot save all of his children, but he always loves them just the same.

I will always love you just the same.

Love,

Wendy

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Prayer and Faith – Love, Wendy

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I need not subscribe to anyone else’s idea of how “to pray” or what “to believe”.
My individual spiritual practice has been my primary source of inspiration and motivation on my journey of recovery. It continues to deepen my faith. It works for me.
God saved my life nearly 12 years ago from a life threatening brain disease known as SUD. (Substance Use Disorder).

He has provided me profound life lessons where I have learned to become more self aware, self regulated, self sufficient, and to grow more empathy of social awareness in my interaction with others.

Spirit has taught me that prayer, self care, love and kindness are the keys to connection, happiness, inner peace, and abundance…a life where I seek a spiritual answer that unfolds organically rather than reacting in an escalated moment of fear, frustration or disappointment.

Prayer and faith is subjective and personal.

And a spiritual connection is one’s ability to “intuitively understand something that impacts our soul and gives meaning to our lives”, and recognizing a strong connection to something bigger than oneself.

Pray, in whatever way you connect to God, the Universe, Spirit, or Nature. In this authentic space, you will be lovingly guided, and you will hear the answers. Each spiritual connection is unique. And, be open to a new perspective that teaches us to understand and to respond through a wider lens.

It is through this wider lens that I have learned, grown and continue to evolve. And, I repeatedly step into the space of a wider lens daily as each new day brings its own puzzle of pieces that need to be interlocked in a way that makes sense for me to feel spiritually, physically, and mentally connected.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

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I see you – Love, Wendy

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Sometimes you meet someone, and it’s so clear that the two of you share a spiritual connection…a soul tie that is emotional, physical and spiritual in nature.

It’s so clear that the two of you belong together. There is a visceral feeling…an intuitive jolt that tells you, “He is the one.”

It’s a perfect fit that God has mindfully arranged. And no amount of time or space can change that love. In fact, any space there may be only strengthens the connection.

You meet these people throughout your life, out of nowhere, under the strangest circumstances. They make your heart dance and cause a dopamine overload where you are filled with a spiritual love that can’t be described but only felt.

A love never before experienced, and never again.

They enhance your life…They are a teacher, a lover, a best friend. And no matter who you meet after this spiritual encounter, another will never compare.

Some believe in coincidence, or fate, or luck, but it I believe in the grace of God.

And it definitely makes me believe in miracles through the blessings of the Universe.

I always see you and feel you energetically. Day after day.

I see you.

Love,

Wendy

BOOK

She is my daughter – Love, Wendy

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When someone says to me, “she is on their own path,” meaning, that if she crashes and burns, and even causes her own death, that is her path. It is an insensitive, ignorant, and unconscionable way of thinking. Especially when we can clearly see the chaos and destruction that she has already caused and endured, and is about to endure, some of which may be catastrophic. Destruction that evades her comprehension due to a severe chronic and progressive brain disorder.

We are all connected as we journey through life, and I for one, will step onto the path of a loved one to steer her away from the oncoming flow of destruction.

Isn’t that what love is? And empathy? We must put ourselves in the mindset of another to understand their feelings and emotions, and take an action step, especially when their perception is skewed from reality. Not one and done…over and over and over.

It is up to me to step onto her path, to cross her path, take the wheel with God’s grace, and redirect her. After all, I know her journey. I used to be her. I have the unique perspective of knowing both sides of this life threatening situation. Severe substance use disorder and mental illness induced by prescription drugs, and now for nearly 12 years, wellness in recovery.

It is not her own path. And she is never alone.

When she can’t see clearly, I have to be her eyes, get behind the wheel asking for God‘s grace and direction, and gently reroute her onto the road less traveled where peace and wellness is restored.

The road is long, with many twists and turns, fender benders and even serious accidents that have plagued this victim of a severe brain disorder…but I have hope.

There will come a time when she recognizes the potential catastrophic outcome and will be “sick and tired of being sick and tired.” You cannot run from yourself. You cannot run from this brain disease. And right now, she is drowning in a puddle of delusion.

I am deeply heartbroken and at the same time, I just know that God has been preparing me to embrace her and guide her once she is ready. I just know that God is always creating meaningful circumstances as profound lessons for me never to be forgotten in order to serve others who are lost and unwell with this brain disease. Especially my child.

She has been missing for 3 months, but she is not lost in my heart and mind.

I ask Him to show me how to help her. I ask Him to keep her safe and alive. I ask Him to let me know when it is time to step out onto her path, stop her in her tracks, and get behind the wheel. I ask Him to show me how to intervene with courage, love, empathy and meaning that she will understand.

That journey began last night. I am exhausted but filled with God’s energy.

To be continued…

SHE IS MY DAUGHTER.

#prayfornicole

BOOK

We have got to do better – Love, Wendy

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We’ve got to do better.

We’ve got to take notice of those we engage with, but really stop to ask, “How are you doing?” And it is NOT okay to allow someone else to walk into the conversation and begin a new conversation in the middle of a “check in.” And when we ask another how they are doing, we must be ready and willing to hear an authentic response. If you are just giving a nod of “I see you standing there, how are you?” and you don’t want to actually hear a response, just say “good morning,” and keep moving. Seriously.

We’ve got to do better.

I encounter this daily. Jarring. And if one allows this interruption of a “check in,” especially when they are aware of another’s circumstances, cross them off of your list as a “caring friend/acquaintance/colleague.” If they never ask, “How are you?” in the midst of a challenging time, it speaks volumes about them and their capacity to comfort and to support others. Yet, I witness these same people “vomiting” out all of their woes and expecting one’s undivided attention.

We’ve got to do better.

When I observe others who claim friendship, I assess if that definition aligns with what I believe friendship to be, and what I need in a friend. Reciprocity. Consistency. Empathy. Kindness. “Time sensitive.” Joy. Love. Willing to share.

Giving of one’s time with eye contact, and a touch on the hand or hug can make one’s day. It costs us nothing, but if we feel the price is too high and we are too “busy” in our own head and circumstances, and there is no follow up, you are not a friend.

Friendship is linear. It doesn’t come in waves and only on the upswing.

We’ve got to do better.

And even when we see a stranger pass us by on our daily walk looking down at the ground very obviously in pain, we need to offer a smile. Oh, the smile is so contagious. It has helped me on a number of occasions. And I always reciprocate all that I am given. And give to one in pain when they cannot offer us anything. It is a basic need of the human condition. If you’ve got it, give it away.

One who professes to love us does not allow months to go by without checking in. You cannot “offer a good deed…one and done,” and then fly off of the radar for no apparent reason. We see you living your best life, and yet, not one minute to send a text or an hour to visit to do a friends “check-in.” It negates the “one and done “Good deed.” 

Good deed? Not so much. Not from a place of love. This is from a place of “let me boast all over social media what I am doing (one and done) to further fuel my ego. But those of us on the “receiving end” of that “deed” sit awestruck and dumbfounded at one’s need to “be loved and recognized” as a hero.

Not so much. Ego. Ego. Ego.

We’ve got to do better.

So starting today, let us do better. Either engage with meaning, purpose, and friendship, or simply walk on by. It can be an insult to one’s intelligence and feelings to enter into a “drive-by” friendship. Stay in your own lane, or join me on the journey.

We have GOT to do better.

Love,

Wendy