A man without humility sees fault with the world…
A humbled man asks what he can do to make it better.
Love,
Wendy
Tag: mentalhealthawareness
Be The Example – Love, Wendy
Observe the incredible sense of entitlement and arrogance.
Imagine all the energy it takes for one to spew such self righteousness. It must be exhausting.
Remember that this is all about them and their own feelings of inadequacy.
The solution is to remove yourself from their energy and create distance, emotionally, physically and mentally.
Protect your peace. Refuse to absorb their negativity. Recite the mantra, “I can choose peace rather than this” from “A Course In Miracles.”
Recognize that their behavior is in no way a reflection of your worth, but a projection of their own struggles.
Live your life. It is your best response as you set the example of strength and confidence in who you are.
Your superpowers of strength and confidence is what defines you!
Their entitlement and arrogance defines who they are…even to those who pretend to accept their attitude and are just not yet bold enough to speak their own truth.
Be the example.
Love,
Wendy
Confidence Is Quiet – Love, Wendy
Confidence is quiet.
Insecurity and low self worth are loud because they constantly seek validation and attention, desperately trying to fill the emptiness inside.
Simply observe their reactions and behaviors. You need not respond. They are searching for something external to calm their inner turmoil.
But…
True peace comes from within.
Love and blessings,
Wendy
Reset with your breath – Love, Wendy
Regulate your nervous system.
Stay in control of your personal agency, naturally. Keep your mind sharply on your breath which is the most challenging part of using deliberate breathing.
Deliberate breathing brings the body and mind into a state of calm and focus.
Reset…
Take in two sharp inhales. Exhale long and slowly.
When you find yourself triggered, or your emotions are causing you physical symptoms of anxiety, use your breath.
It is your most accessible tool to intervene with your physiology in real time.
When you make mindful breathing/deliberate breathing a regular practice which becomes part of your lifestyle, it is easier to implement, and to be successful during times of high stress and anxiety.
Go to a quiet place and keep your mind on your breath.
Using substances are only a temporary fix. We always have our breath and it is our most accessible tool to intervene with our nervous system in real time.
I have 13 years of sobriety now and breathing is one of my go to’s when I feel panic or anxiety.
I had to use this on Friday night and even though I’ve practiced mindful breathing for over a decade, it took me almost an hour to re-center and recover. And afterwards, your body can feel exhausted. This is normal as you guide your brain to center.
It takes a lot of mental strength to stay focused on your breath and not the symptoms of the anxiety episode that you are experiencing. This is why it is so vital to make this a daily practice.
Your brain then recognizes immediately the pattern of focus and calm. It strengthens the neural pathways over time that support relaxation and focus. It creates an automatic response to stress that promotes emotional regulation and resilience!
To work with me one on one in my coaching program, call 845–263–4094.
Love, Wendy
Chemical Countdown – Love, Wendy
“Chemical Countdown” is a way of regulating our nervous system through a deliberate breathing technique when we feel provoked or triggered.
There is power in exercising restraint, which builds resilience and character…otherwise known as emotional regulation. In this space, we pause to ask ourselves if what we are feeling is related to a past trauma, or a real present moment threat.
Staying in the present moment to discern if there is a real threat allows us to stay in control and remain calm, as well as disarms the other person or situation. It allows us to focus on our breathing, and to redirect our thoughts. A “Wise Mind” strategy.
Releasing our emotions through healthy practices is more productive than engaging in unnecessary banter.
Love and blessings,
Wendy
A Love Letter to our Wellness in Recovey Community – Love, Wendy
Thank you for trusting me with your personal stories yesterday and last night.
Wow.
There is so much truth to the fact that we ALL have a story, and that when we share our stories, it allows us to feel supported, and to support others who are experiencing challenges, adversity and heartbreak.
Please know that suffering does not discriminate. However, as we come together and we share our experiences, and we pray for each other, we build a loving community, a spiritual community, where we also build resilience. And the more we practice resilience through healthy practices, daily, the stronger we become…the more resilient we become.
We adapt and navigate with mindful determination through the stress, we continue to be productive, go to work, enjoy our family and friends, love, laugh, cry, all together, knowing we are not alone. One day at a time. One hour at a time. One moment at a time.
I shared my personal story of my own 13 year recovery from substance use disorder as well as my daughter’s ongoing battle with this life threatening disease. You reached out privately to share your similar story and experience. And so many of you told me you had not shared before. To unpack that build up of burden is a relief to our physical and mental health.
What I have learned over the years in working in this field, and having the lived experience is that we NEED each other, and we experience comfort when we feel a part of a loving community. And we all deserve to live in peace and wellness, no matter our circumstances.
WE are not alone when we speak our truth and ask for what we need. And inherently, we know what we need to feel better. It will look different for everyone, and will change over time with our circumstances.
Love, kindness, support, prayer. COMMUNITY.
KEEP SHARING.
KEEP PRAYING.
Find whatever healthy practice provides you with wellness and peace, and take time for your self care every day.
You have the right to live your life in peace, joy, and wellness.
You can read my entire story in my book Write Pray Recover:A Journey To Wellness Through Spiritual Solutions and Self Care on Amazon and online bookstores worldwide. https://a.co/d/iUCD8NW
Thank you.
Love and blessings,
Wendy ❤️
Empowering Wellness – Love, Wendy
Using healthy self care practices are the tools that empower my wellness.
Two of my favorite tools are breathwork and music which are grounding, no matter what’s happening around me. It’s like building my own little sanctuary in my body and my mind which ripples into my external space…a space where I can breathe, reset and feel safe.
I always say that breathing is an access point for improving our self-awareness and self-regulation. It is our most accessible tool for intervening with our physiology in real time. Music reminds me of simpler times, and elicits a deep sense of connection.
Empower yourself through healthy practices and do not allow external turmoil and disorder to dictate your inner peace.
Love and blessings,
Wendy
Caring for your mental and physical health during these unprecedented times – Love, Wendy
The brain has its limits when it comes to processing information, especially when it’s complex or emotionally charged.
Psychologically, we tend to get overwhelmed when we are bombarded with too much uncertainty, bad news, or major shifts in their environment. This type of overload (allostatic load–a physiological stress response when repeatedly exposed to stress which is affecting our wellness. DAILY self care is needed for balance and wellness) is where stress hormones like cortisol ramp up, and it becomes harder to focus or make decisions.
When we are observing our fundamental rights and our democracy under attack constantly throughout the day and in a very short amount of time, we feel our safety net blowing in the wind and our once solid foundation crack.
We are watching the erosion of our rights and freedoms.
Practicing extra self care, especially during times of external chaos is the one thing we have control over. We must preserve our personal power. It’s like putting on your own oxygen mask first before you can help others. Our family, friends, our adult children, our grandchildren, our students may be looking to us for comfort and guidance.
By preserving our personal power, we are more inclined to stay grounded and resilient when everything feels overwhelming, and in this space we are able to support others.
I literally felt breathless last night as I tried to fall asleep. I had to do mindful breathing for awhile before I was able to feel more at peace. Deliberately implementing a relaxed breathing pattern calms a dysregulated nervous system.
Our breath is our most accessible tool to intervene with our physiology in real time.
I made the following changes and I am suggesting these to you, my dear readers, as a possible source of alleviating the chronic stress and taking back your personal power.
- Turn off all news notifications on your cell phone. I only left on the “emergency notification.”
- I only watch the weather on the television, never the news broadcast as they tend to bombard us with the same information over and over.
- Engage in self care practices that bring you peace and wellness. There is a wonderful mantra that I practice from “A Course In Miracles” that says, “I can choose peace rather than this.” Whenever I begin to feel my body tightening and my heart racing, I remind myself of this simple yet powerful mantra.
- I am a writer, so writing is so cathartic for me as I release my thoughts and emotions onto the paper. Perhaps journaling your thoughts and emotions would be helpful. Writing stimulates the RAS Reticular Activation System in the brain and this part of the brain filters and processes information. SO EFFECTIVE.
- Getting outdoors to breathe the fresh air and to release the overwhelming negative energy through a walk in nature is so comforting. I always come home feeling calmer, more peaceful and hopeful.
- I listen to “Calm Radio” on Pandora.
- I practice mediation and mindful breathing and stretching.
- Give yourself whatever you need…i.e., your favorite cup of tea, coffee, light candles, essential oils, etc. A healthy practice supports a healthy mind and body.
- Talk to a trusted friend or loved one. DON’T get stuck on the negative. Going around and around about the negative creates a downward spiral of our mental health.
- IN ANY MOMENT WHERE WE FEEL STRESSED OR TRIGGERED, WE CAN CHOOSE TO USE OUR “RATIONAL AND WISE MIND” VS OUR “EMOTIONAL MIND,” IF WE ARE PRACTICING ONGOING SELF CARE. IN THIS MOMENT, WE CAN STOP AND ASK OURSELVES, “WHAT ACTION/PRACTICE WILL SERVE ME BEST IN THIS MOMENT? WHAT WILL PROMOTE MY WELLNESS?”
Allow your brain space and time to receive information, and use the information as it pertains to your individual situation.
Most of what we are experiencing is out of our control. Focus on yourself and your loved ones.
Do whatever you can to preserve your physical and mental health by practicing daily self care, and do it often throughout the day.
Release any thoughts of worry. Be prepared for unexpected events in whatever way brings you peace. And remind yourself often…
“I can choose peace rather than this…”
Love and blessings,
Wendy
Pause – Love, Wendy
Today, before you make a choice to numb your stress with an unhealthy substance or behavior, please ask yourself, “How is this going to be productive in navigating this situation?” “What other action could I take to bring me peace in this situation?” “Who can I talk to about my feelings?”
One hour at a time. Baby steps.
It’s easy to fall into the trap of quick fixes when stress hits, but they rarely offer lasting relief.
These questions give you time to “Pause” which is a practical approach to making the healthiest decision for yourself.
Taking it step by step keeps things from feeling too overwhelming.
Love and blessings,
Wendy
Color My World – Love, Wendy
Be a colorful thinker and see the whole picture.
Black-and-white thinking limits one in understanding the complexity and variation of shades of situations, people, and perspectives.
Love,
Wendy
Write Pray Recover 