BOOK, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

Aging Outside of the Box:Soul Notes – Love, Wendy

“The partner that you choose is a reflection of you…your character, your integrity, and your truth.
Your choice reflects your own self-worth.”

I wrote those words in October of 2020, not realizing how many versions of myself I would still have to meet. I’ve loved deeply, lost painfully, and rebuilt myself from the ashes more times than I can count. Each heartbreak has stripped away an illusion and left behind another layer of truth.

And yet, some things remain the same. I still believe that the people we choose mirror our own belief in what we deserve. I’ve chosen men who reflected both my light and my unhealed wounds. I’ve chosen love that challenged me to finally see my worth beyond what anyone else could give.

I still want to fall in love, travel, write, laugh until my stomach hurts, and dance in my kitchen. I still believe that someone will love me for the fire in my heart and the depth of my soul, not for the number on my birth certificate.

I’ve earned every one of these years…and I’m going to live them boldly, in living color, with music, with meaning…with deliberate animation and purpose.

“You cannot yell at a seed to force it to grow quickly. Instead, you love and nurture it. You meet all of its needs, and slowly, deliberately, it blooms into a beautiful flower. Find peace within yourself. Continue to stay grounded in faith, emulate gratitude, and practice patience. Go to a place of acceptance, and everything you desire will be waiting for you there.”
— Write Pray Recover

Through gratitude, prayer, and self-care, we remember that our spirit never ages…

it simply expands.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

Science Meets Soul:Soul Notes – Love, Wendy

I use writing as a tool for healing.
When we write down what we are feeling internally, it activates a part of the brain called the Reticular Activating System (RAS).
Writing with pen and paper stimulates this system, which filters the information our brain needs to process and supports my healing journey.
I teach about RAS in all of my mental health and wellness workshops, and I follow my knowledge into action by integrating evidence-based wellness strategies that reinforce intentional practices to retrain the brain toward calm, clarity, and healing.
This is the foundation of my holistic and integrative healing journey.

Carrying Lupus pain day after day is incredibly heavy…showing up, staying open, doing everything possible to heal and being unable to sleep…is completely exhausting in a way that most people can’t comprehend. 

When your body keeps screaming despite all your effort, it’s not just physical pain anymore; it’s heartbreak, frustration, and grief for the life I want back where I don’t have to be mindful of every move, every position, every activity and where I can make and keep plans with family and friends, or to not have to drop a course that I registered for because even sitting at home on the computer and then completing assignments is too painful after working a full day

The doctors tell me I need to give it 8-12 weeks. It has only been 3 since I began treatment. 

I pray for strength. I pray for patience and for grace…one breath at a time…

I continue to remind myself that I have been here before, and Lupus did go into remission.

I write. I process. I heal…

This is what resilience looks like in real time…messy, painful, faithful. One breath, one word, one day at a time.

The Reticular Activating System helps us reframe, refocus, and retrain the brain. Writing activates healing from within…

Science meets soul.

For anyone walking through invisible pain—you are not alone.

Healing asks for patience, and faith holds the light when strength runs low.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

Harmonious Health 4 Life, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

“Power With” vs “Power Over” – Love, Wendy

Living with Lupus requires an awareness of one’s needs, especially in the midst of a flare…”power with” vs “power over…”

Surrender…

Not as giving up, but as trusting your body’s wisdom and allowing yourself to be cared for by rest and grace.

On the days when Lupus is “LOUD,” I reframe with a mindset of, “power with” rather than “power over…”

It’s the essence of honoring my body as a partner in healing rather than a battle to win.

As I continue to stabilize, I honor my resilience, I reclaim my strength, and I cultivate wellness.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

Creating Wealth:Soul Notes – Love, Wendy

There was a time in my life when I could buy anything I wanted, travel anywhere I desired, and surround myself with all the outer symbols of success. By every worldly measure, I was wealthy. Yet inside, I was spiritually bankrupt, physically depleted, and emotionally exhausted. My soul was starving for something that money could never buy…love, peace, and genuine connection.

The more I tried to fill the emptiness with things, the emptier I became.

I learned that material wealth without inner wellness is poverty of the spirit.

Today, and for the past 13 years, I define wealth as balance, harmony, and nourishment. Wealth is waking up with purpose. It’s the freedom to rest when I’m tired, to love without fear, and to speak truth from my heart.It’s laughter with family, a gentle sunrise, and faith that sustains me through pain.

True wealth is not what I own…it’s who I’ve become through the healing.
True wealth isn’t found in possessions, but in presence, meaning and love and experiencing joy even during life’s challenges.

If you have your health, you are wealthy.

If you have loving family and friends, you are wealthy.

If you have a job or career that you love and where you can earn a living, you are wealthy.

If you allow yourself to love, and if you are loved, you are wealthy.

If you have a spiritual practice that nourishes and supports you, you are wealthy.

Wealth should never be measured in dollars and cents, or in “stuff.”

Wealth is the daily nourishment that feeds us body, mind and spirit.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life, Write Pray Recover

Fear Is A Liar – Love, Wendy

As so many people are finding it challenging to navigate our current culture and climate due to our liberties and freedom being snatched, daily, I have created some easy to use, daily reminders, to keep us focused on our health, wellness and peace using our own personal agency and autonomy through constructive action…because we absolutely have choices…and because “Fear Is A Liar…”

Each morning, I will allow myself 30 minutes to validate how I am feeling, to practice radical acceptance of world events, and to grieve the loss I feel of all that has been stripped of my freedom. 

I will then leave it there on the shelf until the next morning, and continue about my day with conviction and purpose in obtaining my goals…unapologetically!

Never at night before bed. Before bed, I will remind myself that my fear is spewing a narrative based on that day’s events and my worst fear of demise, without fact. 

Every day, I will remind myself to protect my peace and wellness so that I will be in full health physically and mentally in order to live, laugh, love and learn, and that positive change is inevitable.

I will remind myself that I have no power over helping others in this crisis. I will focus solely on my own well-being and send loving thoughts to anyone else struggling. When my wellness cup is full, I am able and willing to support others. I will not cause myself emotional or physical bankruptcy where I will deplete my necessary innate resources that I need to reach my goals, to live my best life in these challenging times, and so that I may invest in my future, and in the future of my loved ones.

I will use my breath to regulate my emotions, and remind myself that I can always choose peace rather than my catastrophic thoughts. (Breathe in deeply 4, hold for 2, exhale 6.)

Each day, I will choose a word of the day that describes my victories to remind myself of my strong will and mindset.

Lastly, I remind myself that I can always call a trusted friend or loved one for support, and that I am loved by the Universe who is dedicated to helping me to achieve my goals. I will listen for spiritual guidance and ask for spiritual support whenever I need a loving reminder that all is well.

I am never alone. ❤️

Use one or all of the above as a personal mantra to connect to your inner strength and balance.

In these troubling and uncertain times, I am sending my love, hugs and support for your well being…body, mind and spirit.

Take care of yourself. Never give away your power by depleting your mental and physical strength to circumstances beyond what you can control.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life, Write Pray Recover

Agency, Autonomy and Action – Love, Wendy

Each day we are given opportunities to decide…will we remain silent, or will we speak up for our bodies, our wellness, and our peace? Self-advocacy begins the moment we choose courage over compliance.

What is self-advocacy and courage when our wellness is at stake?

You protect your body, and you stand in your truth despite the silence and resistance of others who are indifferent to your needs.

It takes tremendous discipline…the kind rooted in self-respect and self-preservation.

Never allow fear of authority stop you from demanding what you deserve…safety, dignity, and humane treatment.

Use your voice with strength and clarity. Speak your truth…

Stand in your power…Use personal agency and autonomy to demand what is rightly yours…

Health, wellness and peace.

Self care is the actions that we take to achieve wellness…and wellness is where we stand in our power.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life, Write Pray Recover

Resilience:For Wendy and David – Love, Wendy

I was thinking on my way home from work yesterday that living in chronic pain is so humbling…I can never take one moment for granted…

I live with Lupus and hadn’t needed regular medication in five years as I managed it holistically…until now.

Living with chronic pain makes the small things feel sacred…the details more palatable…every quiet, manageable moment becomes a gift.

Our awareness of our humility is our deepest strength.

Here are four tiny practices that honor this insight without asking for more than you can give while you’re navigating any challenging situation with your health:

  1. One-breath gratitude once tonight before sleep. Take one long, slow inhale, and on the exhale name one small yet meaningful thing from today that made you feel stronger and at peace (a warm shower, a walk on the beach, a song you liked). That single moment trains the brain to notice tiny graces and successes. It reminds us of our power.

2. A moment of kindness to the body. Put a warm hand over your injured/painful area, soften your jaw, breathe 4 inhale, 1 hold it, 6 exhale…just once, and say aloud or silently to yourself, “I did what I could today. I showed up. I honored myself. I am worthy. I am healing.”

3. A “Humility Journal” (30 seconds). When you have a spare 30 seconds, jot down one word that describes what this day taught you (humility, steadiness, courage, patience). It’s just a quiet record by you, for you, of how you keep showing up.

4. Reflection and Warm Embrace. (From my book, Write Pray Recover:A Journey To Wellness Through Spiritual Solutions and Self Care “Today I am grateful for…”
Offer yourself a hug, a warm cup of your favorite beverage, time listening to your favorite music, or whatever a “self embrace” feels like for you…Love yourself.

You’re allowed to see the grief and feel the frustration, and the lesson at the same time.

I am resilient. I am becoming…

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Harmonious Health 4 Life, Write Pray Recover

I Am Not Invisible – Love, Wendy

The “invisible” nature of lupus flares can make it hard for others to understand the severity of the illness, leading to misinterpretations and lack of support. 

“Lupus is a disease where the immune system mistakenly attacks healthy tissues and organs, including causing “Lupus Fog/Brain Fog.” It can affect any part of the body. When lupus affects the spine, the immune response attacks normal proteins, leading to joint and nerve destruction, bone loss, inflammation, and swelling. As damage occurs, your spinal discs are less able to absorb shock, which can lead to the pain associated with DDD.” (Degenerative Disc Disease).

And this is my diagnosis…Lupus (SLE), and DDD.

Due to a surgery in July, 2025, Lupus was activated, and I have been unable to recover thus far. Prior to that surgery, I was footloose and fancy free. 😊

Recently I read about a woman experiencing a flare who wrote: “For me, I may see a rash appear on my face and I know this is the beginning of a flare. Friends, family, and co-workers often can’t begin to understand that the rash is the beginning of what is taking place on the inside. You appear okay, aside from the rash, but fatigue and pain can be an overwhelming challenge.

Recently, I went to an event and I looked like the healthiest version of wellness with my hair, nails, and makeup done flawlessly, and smiling and greeting other attendees. I was experiencing a tremendous amount of pain, and I could literally feel my legs beginning to swell, in fact, you could see my knee swelling through my pants. The burning and sharp pain shooting down my legs and in my back, in addition to my hands beginning to stiffen and swell was obvious. After about 15 minutes, a friend walked over and asked if I was okay as she noticed my demeanor had changed from when I had arrived. I told her that I really needed to go home, and I quietly made my exit, making this disease even more invisible. I always feel that I am making others uncomfortable when I am experiencing pain. I am often told by friends and family that they would have never know I was in pain because “you look so healthy.”

Lupus IS invisible. If I am not limping, one would never guess that every joint, from my arms, hands, fingers, and legs, are so swollen and in pain. I think the lupus community as a whole experiences this invisible pain.

Yesterday I arrived to work at 7:15 am, and felt confident that my Lupus was going back into remission, but by noon, after I had walked excessively, sat, stood, bent down, twisted, (all the things I was told by my doctors NOT to do), I could barely stand up. The pain was so intense, it caused me to feel sick to my stomach. When it was time to leave at 3:15pm, I was completely swollen and could only slide my left leg as I walked to my car because the swelling would not allow me to bend/step…

The great news?…

Today, I begin a new treatment…I pray that my body responds favorably.

I love my work as a Reading Specialist, a Mental Health and Wellness Educator and Coach, and love spending time with loved ones, so I am praying that the excruciating pain and profuse swelling is alleviated with this new treatment. My treatment consists of an integrative approach which is what my book, Write Pray Recover:A Journety To Wellness Through Spiritual Solutions and Self Care, encourages.

The marriage of holistic solutions and traditional medicine offers a variety of treatment tailored to my health and wellness goals.

And please know that Lupus flares ARE invisible. Your smile and empathy encourage me to keep going.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

For more information on Lupus, go to https://www.lupus.org