When someone says to me, “she is on their own path,” meaning, that if she crashes and burns, and even causes her own death, that is her path. It is an insensitive, ignorant, and unconscionable way of thinking. Especially when we can clearly see the chaos and destruction that she has already caused and endured, and is about to endure, some of which may be catastrophic. Destruction that evades her comprehension due to a severe chronic and progressive brain disorder.
We are all connected as we journey through life, and I for one, will step onto the path of a loved one to steer her away from the oncoming flow of destruction.
Isn’t that what love is? And empathy? We must put ourselves in the mindset of another to understand their feelings and emotions, and take an action step, especially when their perception is skewed from reality. Not one and done…over and over and over.
It is up to me to step onto her path, to cross her path, take the wheel with God’s grace, and redirect her. After all, I know her journey. I used to be her. I have the unique perspective of knowing both sides of this life threatening situation. Severe substance use disorder and mental illness induced by prescription drugs, and now for nearly 12 years, wellness in recovery.
It is not her own path. And she is never alone.
When she can’t see clearly, I have to be her eyes, get behind the wheel asking for God‘s grace and direction, and gently reroute her onto the road less traveled where peace and wellness is restored.
The road is long, with many twists and turns, fender benders and even serious accidents that have plagued this victim of a severe brain disorder…but I have hope.
There will come a time when she recognizes the potential catastrophic outcome and will be “sick and tired of being sick and tired.” You cannot run from yourself. You cannot run from this brain disease. And right now, she is drowning in a puddle of delusion.
I am deeply heartbroken and at the same time, I just know that God has been preparing me to embrace her and guide her once she is ready. I just know that God is always creating meaningful circumstances as profound lessons for me never to be forgotten in order to serve others who are lost and unwell with this brain disease. Especially my child.
She has been missing for 3 months, but she is not lost in my heart and mind.
I ask Him to show me how to help her. I ask Him to keep her safe and alive. I ask Him to let me know when it is time to step out onto her path, stop her in her tracks, and get behind the wheel. I ask Him to show me how to intervene with courage, love, empathy and meaning that she will understand.
That journey began last night. I am exhausted but filled with God’s energy.
To be continued…
SHE IS MY DAUGHTER.
#prayfornicole
Write Pray Recover 
A mother’s love can endure any storm that comes in the path of her children. Regardless of their age. Never will a mother as strong and determined as you will ever give up. I pray to God every day to please whisper in her ear, that she is needed and loved. Go home and let your loved ones guide you to the help that you so desperately need. With Gods grace may she hear the words. Amen 🙏🏻
Thank you for this gorgeous, heartfelt and loving sentiment. I appreciate so much your support and prayers.