BOOK, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

Roadblocks to Love:Soul Notes – Love, Wendy

People don’t connect the way they used to…or love the way they used to. Something has changed.

Relationships now feel like a complicated road map. Turn to the left and you’re met with a brick wall. Turn to the right and you’re on a one-way street. Try to turn back, and there are barriers blocking your way…

Roadblocks to love.

It’s as if we’ve all been caught in endless “traffic”…so much noise, so much exhaustion that we no longer have the energy for the commitment of a long lasting, winding journey of true intimacy. We take the quickest route, the shortest visit, the surface-level conversation that demands the least of us — where most people I meet seem to feel “safe.”

I see it in the “Good Morning, how are you?” that is mumbled as they never stop to make eye contact…not authentic…and the times when we are experiencing hardship, heartbreak, or pain and those “safe” in their own cocoon look the other way in order to avoid a conversation that could be uncomfortable. People have forgotten how to offer empathy.

But I remember another way. When I was growing up, and even when my children were growing up, we greeted each other with a kiss on the cheek, a hug, and a smile. Connection was natural, tactile, warm and animated. Today it’s barely a hug, sometimes just a tap where one barely leans in…a gesture that says, “Don’t get too close.”

What has happened to humanity? Have we become so afraid of intimacy that we keep love at arm’s length?

I believe we have. Fear has replaced trust. Self-protection has replaced presence. And yet…my heart still longs for the genuine embrace, the unhurried conversation, the love that lingers.

So I choose to keep loving the “old way.” To keep showing up fully. To keep offering a hug, a smile, and a heart wide open. Because even if the world has changed, my love, my compassion, my authenticity remains.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

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A “Sobering Truth” – Love, Wendy

In a matter of one minute everything can change. And it does.

Your life can take a turn you did not expect. It may feel incredibly foreign. Unfamiliar. New information that is old is delivered.

Sobering.

You are forced to see new perspectives, and to practice acceptance of information that is unconscionable, yet undeniable.

And, you carry the disturbing burden of this new information, and a new perspective into the present day in order to remind yourself that nothing and no one is ever really one hundred percent of what, or whom they present to others.

And there are some who are complete imposters, one hundred percent.

Sobering…

Lesson offered over and over again finally sinks in, and is learned.

When the truth reveals itself the first time, accept it. Put down the rose colored glasses, stop listening to fairy tales, kick the garbage to the curb, and move on.

Take care of yourself. Depend only upon yourself. Love and nurture yourself. Forgive yourself for loving and trusting the wrong person…over and over…

And keep moving forward…

Sober.

The “truth” was pure deceit.

Love,

Wendy

BOOK, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

Foolish Games:Soul Notes – Love, Wendy

You can never build trust with someone who runs from accountability.
And…you can never grow with someone who sees boundaries as a personal attack.
They don’t reflect…they deflect.

They don’t communicate…they react rather than respond constructively.

Never allow what someone else brings the table be the only thing you have to eat.

And…strive to be respected, rather than to be liked.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

Stillness in a Turning World:Soul Notes – Love, Wendy

Reflection
This Soul Note was written in the early morning hours, when pain and uncertainty had been my unwelcome companions for many days. My body felt fragile, my heart was tender from recent loss, and yet… the quiet of dawn reminded me that even in struggle, every moment is a gift.

Stillness is not the absence of movement — it is the presence of awareness. I realized that life keeps turning whether we are ready or not, but we can choose to anchor ourselves in the now. In stillness, gratitude blooms. In stillness, we heal.

Stillness in a Turning World

Each day is precious.
Each hour is precious.
Each moment is precious.
Each second is precious.

Experience each one fully — in its presence, in real time.
Direct your energy into each fleeting moment.
Direct, and redirect.
Experience every experience in wonder… in awe… in gratitude.

Savor.
Contemplate.
Experience.

Even as the world turns and time moves on,
the soul can remain still — anchored in the now.

Seconds turn into minutes… into hours… into days… into weeks… into years…
in an “untimely manner.”

Ask yourself, “How can I re-direct my experiences and thoughts into the present moment?

Mantra: Between the stillness and the passage of time…I breathe, and I experience each moment.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

Chasing to be Chosen – Love, Wendy

Chasing to be chosen is a trauma response.
Your nervous system is running on an old program where you thought you had to earn someone’s love. You’re confusing inconsistency with connection. Sometimes, people idealize the other person or the potential of the relationship, overlooking the red flags of inconsistency.

“In some cases, inconsistent behavior can be a form of manipulation, where one person is keeping the other “on their toes” to maintain power and control.”

Take back your power. YOU are worthy in every moment without anyone else’s validation.

Familiar doesn’t mean healthy. It may feel like home when you haven’t felt anything different in relationships, including with your caregivers as a child. If it felt like chaos and dysfunction, that’s what “home“ feels like to you… this is your comfort zone…where you feel safe.

So when they pull away, it feels like you are “homeless.” And when they come back, even if it’s for a second, your “home” is actually a dopamine rush that settles your mind and nervous system only for a minute until they disappear..again…and they will.
It’s an addictive cycle of chaos…of control…certainly not love.

Set healthy boundaries to protect your overall wellness. You are not responsible for their inconsistent, dysfunctional behavior.

A true connection is built on mutual respect, consistency and an eagerness to support the other person in fulfilling their needs and enhancing their well being…reciprocity…not causing them constant confusion and dysregulation of their nervous system.

Rather than romanticizing, or excusing their behavior, create a grounding anchor mantra where you speak the truth of their harmful behavior. This is your boundary and clarity statement — it keeps harmful energy out.

Your brain can’t hold both “he loves me” and “his behavior is harmful to my well being” in focus without blurring them. This separates them so you stop merging them into one person.

The minute you begin to replace the romanticizing with the TRUTH of their inconsistent and harmful behavior, you guide your brain back to the truth of the “relationship.”

Suggested Mantra: The man I loved exists only in moments. The man I must protect myself from is the one who always returns.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

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A Garden of Peace:Soul Notes-Love, Wendy

Each day, I bloom a little brighter, nourished by sweet love, gratitude, and the joy of growing and becoming as the petals fall to the ground to make room for new blossoms.

Tend to your own garden…the soil eventually devours the weeds. 😉

Everything changes when everything changes.🌻

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

From Wound to Warrior:Soul Notes – Love, Wendy

My silence is not born of anger,

but of evolution.

Like the sunflower,

I have turned toward the light —

the light of my own becoming.

Through inner work and a growth mindset,

I have learned that I am worthy

of a love that meets me

with the same depth, energy,

and generosity

I have always given. 

Mantra: Like the sunflower, I always stretch toward the light that nourishes me.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

Get Ready – Redesigning a Blank Space – Soul Notes – Love, Wendy

Aging means change. And change is inevitable at every stage of life. The earlier we learn to “go with the flow,” the easier the adjustments become. Aging is fortuitous AND by design — it is the life experience unfolding.

We may begin to notice changes that require us to be flexible in accepting ourselves and others. Movement that once felt effortless may now call for extra rest and mindful recovery. Our minds might need more deliberate stimulation to maintain brain health and cognitive performance. Our bones and teeth often require more attentive care due to natural wear and tear, decreased bone density, and increased vulnerability to disease. Enamel thins, gums recede, and bone loss can occur, making teeth more sensitive and susceptible to decay. Age-related health conditions and medications can further complicate oral and skeletal health, making proactive care essential.

As we age, we may find ourselves single more often, spending much of our time “solo.” Rather than seeing this alone time as emptiness, we are invited to view it as a sacred space for re-discovery and exploration of self.

And yet, just like running against the wind, aging can feel like pushing through invisible resistance — a force that slows us down but also strengthens us if we meet it with grace. It invites us to dig deeper into our resilience, find new rhythms, and align with what matters most. Rather than resist the resistance, we can learn to lean into it — with wisdom, softness, a sense of humor, inner direction, and outer destinations that re-awaken our senses to the life experience.

As we age, relationships naturally evolve — especially with our adult children. We may no longer be needed in the same way, and that shift can feel both liberating and tender. There may be a grieving of what was, even as we honor what still is and what is yet to come. Likewise, our relationship with Spirit may deepen or be redefined, shaped by lived experience, questions, and quiet longings. Aging asks us to stay open — to new ways of connecting, listening, and loving, even when the form changes.

Loss often becomes a deeper part of life’s fabric as we age. We may grieve the death of a partner, a once-vibrant love, or the imagined future we never got to live. These griefs don’t disappear with time — they become sacred landmarks on the map of our becoming. And yet, even in the ache, we may find ourselves surprised by the stirrings of new affection, new companionship, or a new kind of love. The heart, seasoned but still tender, may quietly ask: Is it possible to open again? Aging doesn’t mean closing the chapter on love — it means learning to love with more presence, patience, and depth than ever before.

To age is to live in motion — not just outwardly, but within. It is the art of becoming softer and stronger all at once. Of meeting the changing terrain of body, mind, and heart not with fear, but with curiosity. It asks us to lean into the wind, to make peace with solitude, to laugh often, and to love bravely — even after loss. It calls us to stay rooted in our inner direction, while still seeking outer destinations that awaken wonder.

Aging is not the closing of a story. It is a deeper chapter — one rich with nuance, memory, humility, and growth. We are not fading; we are refining. And in that sacred refinement, we may just find a version of ourselves we’ve waited a lifetime to meet.

Mantra:

I embrace the gifts of my journey, honoring the wisdom and grace that come with each passing day.

Journaling Prompt:

Take a quiet moment to reflect on your journey through aging. Write about a specific experience, insight, or relationship that has grown richer or clearer with time. How has this shaped your understanding of yourself and your life? What feelings of gratitude arise as you honor this wisdom?