Tag: love

BOOK, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

It is all an Illusion – Love, Wendy

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Sometimes you have to learn to live with the realization that resolution never comes…and that more of us live with this truth than we admit.

There’s something you desperately want to control, something you believe will enhance your life, that no matter how hard you attempt to coerce it, never comes to fruition… although at times you feel you are “almost there,” which eventually reveals itself as an illusion.

Perhaps it is someone you have prayed would get out of their own way so they might experience true love and joy…someone you hope will one day realize that their patterns are diminishing their life experiences, and that they might finally meet your energy in a committed life together.

Or maybe you seek acknowledgment or validation you have been waiting a lifetime…or a “lovetime”…to hear. And of course, there is the familiar ache of trying to force an outcome, gripping the steering wheel tightly, to no avail…because it exists completely outside your sphere of control, far off the beaten path.

And so… patience has become a survival skill. Not the patience of watching desires finally come to fruition, but the patience of acceptance…one freaking day at a time.

Acceptance that complete surrender to external circumstances is where we take back our power…and our peace.

And the Universe will continue to assign this lesson until you finally internalize it… breathe it… speak it… sleep it… live it.

Release your grip.

It is all an illusion.

Love,

Wendy

BOOK, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

“Am I Really “Safe?” – Love, Wendy

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I have written in my book, Write Pray Recover: A Journey to Wellness Through Spiritual Solutions and Self Care, that “Uncertainty tends to encourage us to stay where we feel safe.”

But when I examine this more closely… am I really safe?

In the quiet of my space, I know exactly what I “should” do. Why don’t I just take action? What is making me feel so restrictive in acting on knowledge that I know is the healthy, forward-thinking choice?

And here it is…

It is the story attached to the action.

Ending a toxic relationship means admitting judgment failure…holding space for it far too long and even returning to it after finding my resolve to exit. Having an honest and difficult conversation means facing my own suppressed truth and the conflict I avoided because conflict feels intolerable and instills a sense of loss—even when that loss is actually a gain to my health, my wellness, my peace, and my freedom.

The timing is never the “right time.” Especially when we’ve framed the relationship as a love story, or the job or career as security…even when that security was never truly safe.

Circumstances rarely change on their own. People do not change simply through conversation…change requires action, implemented consistently and often. It requires the willingness—and sometimes the eagerness—to create change that enhances your life and well-being.

There is a space…a crevice…between knowing and taking action. Simply “holding space” or waiting does not close that gap or change the truth. The only way to securely bridge it is the decision to act despite the restrictive feelings that inhibit a growth mindset…one that is forward-thinking and active.

We can continue to ask, “Am I really safe?” And the truth will either become gradually embodied—or gradually buried beneath inner dialogue and “justification” for inaction.

And regardless of our action…love may always remain…

That pause between knowing and acting is deeply uncomfortable. The uncertainty can be debilitating because it reveals agency in situations where feeling powerless is more comfortable. As unhealthy as this is within a fixed mindset, more often than not, it is the human condition.

As I also write in my book, “Self care is the actions that we take to achieve wellness, and wellness is where we stand in our power.”

Love and blessings,
Wendy

BOOK, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

Auld Lang Syne:Soul Notes – Love, Wendy

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Happy New Year’s Eve, Dear Readers,

May 2026 meet you gently and bring renewed hope, wellness, peace and freedom to us all.

Here is my last blog for 2025.

Thank you so much for following my blog and supporting my journey.

Wishing you all that you desire, deserve, and dream of in the new year.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

I begin this new year with renewed hope and wellness.

Freedom…

The best gifts in life are free.

Freedom is not the absence of pain, but the presence of truth.
It arrives when we choose to release illusion.
It is the quiet release from cycles that harm,
the courage to stop romanticizing familiarity
and to choose what is steady, reciprocal, and real.

Even in grief, freedom speaks…
removing what cannot stay,
making room for what is real, regulated, and safe.

Especially now.

May I choose what is steady, reciprocal, and real…

May what is no longer mine fall away with grace,
and may what is meant for me arrive without force.

I remember…without clinging…

I honor…without romanticizing…

I release…without bitterness…

I move forward…without force.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

Progress? OR Pretend?:Soul Notes – Love, Wendy

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“The mind must be tested in situations where its quality can be revealed. Not by how many ideas you’ve absorbed, but by how you actually behave when tested. Not by what you understand intellectually, but by what you demonstrate practically. This is the measure that destroys most people’s self-assessment. Because by this standard, your progress isn’t measured by how much you’ve learned or how many insights you’ve had. It’s measured by whether you respond differently to situations that used to overwhelm you.

Do you still react with the same defensiveness when criticized? Do you still avoid the same uncomfortable conversations? Do you still make decisions from the same fears?

If the answer is yes, then whatever progress you’ve made exists only in theory. You’ve upgraded your understanding without upgrading your behavior, which is like downloading new software but never installing it. You walk around with all this potential transformation stored in your mind, never actually running it when situations demand it.”

by Stoic Wisdom

Interpretation by Wendy Blanchard:

Growth is not proven by what we understand, but by how we respond when tested.
Insight that doesn’t change behavior is only theory.
Real progress shows up when old fears no longer run our choices, when we stop avoiding hard conversations, and when we no longer sacrifice our wellbeing to be chosen.
Until behavior changes, the mind is only running in circles…full of potential, never applied.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

As Within…So Without:Soul Notes – Love, Wendy

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When I very recently learned that what he offered was never love, but attachment, I sat with it so that I could reconcile the truth…

And it is so painful…

I made the decision to say goodbye and to never give it further attention…

“As within…so without.”

The more you nurture your inner peace, strength, and clarity, the more your outer life will naturally align.

“As within, so without.”

By committing to your inner world, you don’t just move on…you radiate a new reality that reflects the freedom and authenticity you deserve.

I have connected the dots with total clarity: the “as within, so without” pattern in my life has been shaped by my inner beliefs formed in childhood and reinforced by my relationships. That awareness alone is huge…it is the first real step toward consciously reshaping my life.

Every partner that I have chosen reflected my prior inner story of feeling “not good enough,” unseen, and unworthy of love. The most recent relationship reinforced that “not good enough” and God brought him back as a final discernment, confirming that I have broken the pattern of choosing partners who speak love but lack the capacity to live it.

This new realization, however heartbreaking, means I can intentionally rewrite the inner story…and that will ripple outward into my relationships, choices, and experiences. No more choosing a broken soul who does not understand the meaning of love between a man and a woman, compromise and truth.

As within…so without…

Amen.

From a favorite song by Forest Blakk, I repeat…”Take it, when she gives you her heart, Don’t you break it, Let your arms be a place she feels safe in, She’s the best thing that you’ll ever have…She’ll love you if you love her like that.”

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

When Love Returns:Soul Notes – Love, Wendy

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Awakening under a beautiful white blanket of snow, yet in the dark, and hours later as the light comes up, I understand the meaning of the paradox…

beauty can coexist with endings.

Reality bites and awakens the soul. The light returned when I no longer needed to search for it.
Now that the power is restored, I see…

And love returns.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

Soulmate Around My Neck:Soul Notes – Love, Wendy

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A person can feel love profoundly…

and yet be incapable of the work required to sustain it.

This is not about the depth of the emotion.
It is about the fragility of the person experiencing it…

A PATTERN…

He loves in bursts.
Powerfully.
Passionately.
Convincingly.

But love that comes in surges also disappears in surges.

He feels devotion on Monday, collapse on Wednesday, regret on Friday, and righteousness on Sunday.
That isn’t love’s fault…that’s emotional dysregulation.

I am looking at his patterns…

Patterns don’t lie…

He can “talk the work.”
He cannot “live the work.”

When he said, “You are the love of my life”… he meant it in that moment.

But when the discomfort came —
when compromise was needed —
when real healing was required —
his system collapsed.

Because letting go relieved him of responsibility.
It relieved him of consistency.
It relieved him of accountability.
It relieved him of the work he promised but cannot sustain.

And because giving up is less terrifying to him
than facing himself.

And I respect that…

And there isn’t one piece of my soul that feels surprised. I jumped into this with great caution and uncertainty expecting the best and prepared for the worst.

I am trained to recognize the behavior…it is knowledge married to intuition…

His emotions operate like fireworks:
brilliant… explosive… and gone in seconds.

My emotions operate like a lighthouse:
steady… grounded… consistent… guiding.

I fell in love with him because his fire is intoxicating.
I had to leave him because his fire burns the house down.

This is God’s validation of my intuition…yet I wear my “Soulmate” around my neck and “know” that his love was as deep as his actions.

And so on, and so forth…

Love,

Wendy

BOOK, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

Holiday Grief and Gratitude:Soul Notes – Love, Wendy

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I know that I speak to many of you when I say that the holidays may bring up sadness and even grief that we have surpressed…

we miss a loved one…
we find ourselves longing for the life we once lived…
we may be spending the holidays alone for the first time…

Holidays amplify every tender place, especially when family fractures, losses, warm memories, and old joys coexist with the life you have today.

It is normal and even healthy to express grief and gratitude simultaneously. These are authentic emotions that can be felt, processed, and experienced together.

The grief reminds us of all of the love we were blessed to experience as we convey gratitude for the memories, and even for the new experiences and traditions that we have built around those memories in our new normal possibly on our own, and possibly with new additions to our inner circle.

All of us are doing our best to navigate the holidays with open hearts, remembering that love…is never lost.

Wishing you a heartfelt, peaceful and joyous holiday season.

Love and blessings,

Wendy

BOOK, Soul Notes, Write Pray Recover

The Love of Your Life:Soul Notes – Love, Wendy

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The love of your life does not make you feel unsafe.

The love of your life does not abandon accountability.
The love of your life does not force you to shrink, ache, or “recover from them.”

The love of your life supports your wellness.
He nourishes your nervous system.
He protects the tenderness of your spirit.
He elevates your health, not harms it.
He makes you feel chosen, secure, steady…

He shows up.

Love,

Wendy